


this is not going 2 end well

by orphan_account



Series: Group chats and everything in between [2]
Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Normal High School, And It Sometimes Is, Asexual Rafael Waithe, At Least That's What She Tells Herself, Bisexual Lizzie Saltzman, Bisexual Penelope Park, But I'm Making It Up As I Go Along, But It Can Also Be Really Emotional, Demiromantic Roman Sienna, Demisexual Landon Kirby, Everyone Is Gay, Gay Jed, Gay Milton "MG" Greasley, Group chat, Handon Friendship, Henelope brotp, Hope And Josie Are Stuck In The Middle Of It, Hope Hates Sing-A-Longs, Hope Is Just Too Easy To Ship People With Okay, Hope Is So Done, Hope Really Hates Her Friends Sometimes, I Just Haven't Decided on Which Ones, I Know Big Suprise, I Stan Penelope Park, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Jed Is So Confused, Just Everyday Life With My Children, Lizzie And Penelope Are Always Fighting, Love Confessions, Multi, No Plot, Okay So There's Some Plot, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panromantic Landon Kirby, Pansexual Josie Saltzman, Pansexual Roman Sienna, Polyamory, Queer Hope Mikaelson, Queer Kaleb Hawkins, Scheming, There will be ships, These Kids Have Horrible Sleeping Patterns, They're My New Addiction, Trans Kaleb Hawkins, Which Is Half The Reason They Do It, i have too many feelings, i love them all so much, literally none, protective friends, this was supposed to be light and funny, yes another one
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2020-03-04
Packaged: 2021-02-24 15:28:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 21,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21680215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Utterly Perfect:i h8 all of uLanLan:nah u luv usObviousWolf:yea u love us 2 much 2 h8 us!!!MysteriousMagic:u wanna fuck all of us!Matchmaker:ANYWAYORMG creates a group chat and it gets really chaotic really fast
Relationships: Hope Mikaelson & Penelope Park, Hope Mikaelson/Lizzie Saltzman, Hope Mikaelson/Penelope Park (Mentioned), Jed/Landon Kirby, Landon Kirby & Hope Mikaelson, Landon Kirby/Hope Mikaelson (Past), Maya Machado/Hope Mikaelson/Lizzie Saltzman, Milton "MG" Greasley/Kaleb Hawkins, Other Relationship Tags to Be Added, Penelope Park & Lizzie Saltzman, Penelope Park/Josie Saltzman
Series: Group chats and everything in between [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1565263
Comments: 87
Kudos: 291





	1. u can say that again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Seductress:** wait… isnt the test next week??
> 
>  **NerdPower:** …
> 
>  **Pantastic:** jfc
> 
>  **Drama Queen:** oops
> 
> OR
> 
> They've had a group chat for all of five minutes and they're already causing trouble

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = NerdPower  
> Lizzie Saltzman = Drama Queen  
> Kaleb Hawkins = DoItMyWay  
> Penelope Park = Seductress  
> Josie Salzman = Pantastic  
> Hope Mikaelson = LeaveMeAlone  
> Landon Kirby = Sci-Fi Freak  
> Rafael Waithe = TemperOfAWolf

Sunday

_14:24_

_**NerdPower has created a chat** _

_**NerdPower has added Drama Queen, DoItMyWay, Seductress, Pantastic, LeaveMeAlone, Sci-Fi Freak and TemperOfAWolf to the chat** _

_**NerdPower has renamed the chat ‘im bored’** _

**Drama Queen:** rly mg?

 **Pantastic:** y just y

 **LeaveMeAlone:** i get making a gc but y add me?

 **NerdPower** : cuz ur part of the group

 **LeaveMeAlone:** who decided that?

 **DoItMyWay:** u know u dont get a choice in the matter rite?

 **TemperOfAWolf:** did u rly make a gc cuz ur bored?

 **NerdPower:** [kinda ya](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21717055)

 **Seductress:** with these losers? i thought u had better taste

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** hey!

 **Drama Queen:** like i want 2 be stuck with u

 **Pantastic:** how bout u 2 jst calm down

 **LeaveMeAlone:** this is already a nightmare

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** what do we do here anyway?

 **NerdPower:** idk

 **NerdPower:** nerd out talk abt how life sucks

 **NerdPower:** u know normal teenage stuff

 **TemperOfAWolf:** thats it?

 **Drama Queen:** how do i leave?

 **Seductress:** please do

 **Drama Queen:** or maybe ill stay jst 2 annoy u

 **DoItMyWay:** chick fite!

 **Pantastic:** those 2 r always fighting

 **TemperOfAWolf:** this is not going 2 end well

 **LeaveMeAlone:** u can say that again

_18:52_

**NerdPower:** guuuys

 **NerdPower:** we have 2 go 2 school tmw

 **Pantastic:** i thought u liked school?

 **NerdPower:** i do but the kids r mean

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** amen!

 **LeaveMeAlone:** i just ignore them

 **DoItMyWay:** who cares what they think

 **Seductress:** ive never had that problm but ily mg so i can sympathise

 **Drama Queen:** ikr sometimes it feels like the hole worlds out 2 get me

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** can relate

 **DoItMyWay:** overdramatic much?

 **LeaveMeAlone:** the world is pretty harsh

 **Seductress:** whats this? Hope mikaelson relating 2 the rest of us? *sarcastic gasp*

 **LeaveMeAlone:** oh shut up

  
_19:11_

**TemperOfAWolf:** wait! dont we have a test tmw?

 **DoItMyWay:** oh shit!!

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** fuuuuck

 **TemperOfAWolf:** were doomed!

 **Pantastic:** did u 3 forget?

 **Drama Queen:** again? lmao

 **Seductress:** sucks 2 b u

 **TemperOfAWolf:** fuck! fuck! fuck!

 **LeaveMeAlone:** u guys better go study asap

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** yep we shoulf!

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** bye!

 **DoItMyWay:** peace out

 **TemperOfAWolf:** later

 **Drama Queen:** boys smh

 **Pantastic:** there so irresponsible

 **LeaveMeAlone:** u got that rite

 **Seductress:** wait… isnt the test next week??

 **NerdPower:** …

 **Pantastic:** jfc

 **Drama Queen:** oops

 **LeaveMeAlone:** should we tell them?

 **Drama Queen:** no way! thisll be hilarious! 

**Seductress:** for once i agree with saltzman

 **Seductress:** itll be funny!

 **Pantastic:** u 2 r horrible people

 **LeaveMeAlone:** well theres nothing we can do about it now

_21:37_

**Sci-Fi Freak:** ok! im done!

_22:13_

**TemperOfAWolf:** that was harsh

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** ikr its like the teachers r trying 2 kill us

Monday

_01:04_

**DoItMyWay:** i hate math

_01:18_

**Pantastic:** dont we all?

 **Drama Queen:** sleep now!

 **Pantastic:** yea yea

_06:07_

**LeaveMeAlone:** what were u guys doing up a 1 in the morning?

 **DoItMyWay:** finishing hm

 **NerdPower:** that took u awhile

 **DoItMyWay:** look man math is not my strong suit

 **LeaveMeAlone:** is maths any1s strong suit?

 **Pantastic:** if it is i want there number

 **DoItMyWay:** saame

 **LeaveMeAlone:** imma hop in the shower c u at school

 **NerdPower:** cya

_06:58_

**Drama Queen:** y must the school make us get up at such an ungodly hour?

 **DoItMyWay:** cuz there sadists who like 2 watch us suffer

 **Pantastic:** honestly yea

_07:26_

**Seductress:** im getting coffee at the grill u guys want anything?

 **Drama Queen:** cinnamon-spiced latte

 **LeaveMeAlone:** black coffee

 **Pantastic:** peppermint tea please

 **LeaveMeAlone:** the boys say they dont want anything

 **LeaveMeAlone:** there just 2 lazy 2 pick up there phones

 **Seductress:** lol k b there soon

_10:31_

**Sci-Fi Freak:** wtf!! theres no maths test!!

_10:47_

**TemperOfAWolf:** WHAT!!!

_11:26_

**Drama Queen:** lmao!!

 **Drama Queen:** told u guys itd be hilarious!

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** U KNEW

 **LeaveMeAlone:** yea we figured out the test wasnt til next week

 **TemperOfAWolf:** i hate all of u

 **DoItMyWay:** u mean I stayed up late studying for nothin?

 **Pantastic:** at least ull be ready for next week??

_12:14_

**Seductress:** damn it! i missed the show!!

_14:09_

**Sci-Fi Freak:** i hate my life


	2. Pantastic has changed the chat name to ‘Go. To. Sleep!’

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Pantastic:** i think lizzies having an episode…
> 
>  **LeaveMeAlone:** is she ok?
> 
>  **Pantastic:** if u call pacing the room while planning ways 2 kill a person out loud ok…
> 
>  **Pantastic:** then yea shes fine
> 
>  **DoItMyWay:** im sorry wat
> 
> OR
> 
> Just a day in the life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = NerdPower  
> Lizzie Saltzman = Drama Queen  
> Kaleb Hawkins = DoItMyWay  
> Penelope Park = Seductress  
> Josie Salzman = Pantastic  
> Hope Mikaelson = LeaveMeAlone  
> Landon Kirby = Sci-Fi Freak  
> Rafael Waithe = TemperOfAWolf

Wednesday

_13:16_

**_group chat ‘im bored’_ **

**NerdPower:** guys

_13:18_

**NerdPower:** guuuuys

_13:21_

**Seductress:** y r u texting in class?

 **Seductress:** dont u have a moral code or some shit

 **NerdPower:** yea but the teacher is just rambling cuz some kid came in late so im bored!!!

 **Seductress:** ur always bored

 **NerdPower:** tru

**_Drama queen has renamed the chat ‘SHUT UP’_ **

**Seductress:** really?

 **Drama Queen:** some of us r trying 2 pay attenton

 **NerdPower:** sry liz

 **Seductress:** im not

 **Drama Queen:** if ur gonna b annoying dont do it in the gc

 **Seductress:** whatever

_13:27_

**NerdPower:** this woman is still yappin

  
_16:04_

**DoItMyWay:** yooooo

 **LeaveMeAlone:** what?

 **DoItMyWay:** YOOOOO

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** u make no sense 

**DoItMyWay:** im not supposed 2

 **Pantastic:** moving on

 **Pantastic:** i think lizzies having an episode…

 **LeaveMeAlone:** is she ok?

 **Pantastic:** if u call pacing the room while planning ways 2 kill a person out loud ok…

 **Pantastic:** then yea shes fine

 **DoItMyWay:** im sorry wat

 **Pantastic:** her and penny had another fite when she cam over for hm

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** well in that case id be concerned if she wasnt pacing and shit

 **LeaveMeAlone:** honestly ur rite

 **DoItMyWay:** wait! Penelope was over at ur place ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **Pantastic:** shut up! Were just friends!

 **DoItMyWay:** aha

 **DoItMyWay:** and hope and lizzie arent sleeping together

 **LeaveMeAlone:** wait! People think we’re having sex!!

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** u arent??

 **LeaveMeAlone:** NO

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** …

 **Pantastic:** …

 **DoItMyWay:** awkward

 **LeaveMeAlone:** i hate u guys 

_19:09_

**TemperOfAWolf:** lan u left ur bag at my place

_19:14_

**Sci-Fi Freak:** could u bring it 2 school tmw

 **TemperOfAWolf:** np

 **Drama Queen:** u kno private messaging is a thing

 **TemperOfAWolf:** then i wouldnt get 2 annoy u liz

 **Drama Queen:** urg

 **Drama Queen:** y did i ever like u

 **TemperOfAWolf:** cuz im so likeable

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** ur really not

 **TemperOfAWolf:** i thought u were on my side bro!

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** I am but ur still annoying as fuck

 **Drama Queen:** even the thrift store hobbit thinks ur annoying

 **DoItMyWay:** would yall shut up

 **DoItMyWay:** im with my family and they keep complaining bout my phone blowin up

 **Drama Queen:** whatever i have better things 2 do

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** sry

 **TemperOfAWolf:** just turn ur phone off

 **DoItMyWay:** or u could shut up 

**DoItMyWay:** then i wouldnt need 2

 **TemperOfAWolf:** ok im going

Thursday

_02:32_

**Seductress:** any1 up?

_02:41_

**Seductress:** mg

_02:43_

**Seductress:** jojo?

 **Drama Queen:** would u go 2 sleep?

 **Seductress:** oh its just u

 **Drama Queen:** look satan if u just shut up and go 2 sleep i wouldnt need 2 talk 2 u

 **Seductress:** the fact that ur talking 2 me means ur up 2 so…

 **Drama Queen:** im up bc u blew up my phone so its ur fault im up

**_Pantastic has changed the chat name to ‘Go. To. Sleep!’_ **

**Drama Queen:** and now uve woken josie up

 **Pantastic:** u both did actually

 **Drama Queen:** im only up 2 tell the she devil 2 go 2 sleep

 **Seductress:** and in the process woke jojo up

 **Drama Queen:** jojo? rly?

 **Pantastic:** both of u shut up! we have school tmw so get some sleep

 **Drama Queen:** u heard her

 **Pantastic:** u 2 lizzie

 **Drama Queen:** fiiine!

 **Seductress:** only cuz ur asking cutie

 **Pantastic:** what does that even mean?

_07:49_

**DoItMyWay:** imma skip tdy who wants in?

 **Drama Queen:** u r so irresponsible

 **Pantastic:** u rly shouldnt skip kaleb

 **Seductress:** well im in

 **LeaveMeAlne:** u guys r gonna get in trouble

 **DoItMyWay:** mg u in?

 **NerdPower:** we rly shouldnt…

 **Seductress:** cmon its just 1 day!

 **NerdPower:** … fine

 **DoItMyWay:** sweet

 **Drama Queen:** u guys r so busted

 **Seductress:** r u gonna tell?

 **DoItMyWay:** snitches get stitches

 **Drama Queen:** o i wont tell doesnt mean u wont get busted

 **LeaveMeAlone:** just forget it lizzie

 **LeaveMeAlone:** itll come back 2 bite them sooner or later

_11:26_

**NerdPower:** so… we got caught

_13:08_

**LeaveMeAlone:** told u

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've decided I'm going with Hizzie and Posie as the ships (though more might be coming in the future) however, my Hosie heart is still beating from the new episode! Forget Landon! That ending scene with Hope and the twins was everything to me! Also, with all the drama that went on in this weeks episode, Lizzie was the only thing keeping me going, was she an absolute fucking queen this week or not? I can never decide between Hizzie or Hosie but this fic will be Hizzie, is what I was trying to get at. Kinda got carried away there.


	3. wat if humans were just a reality show for aliens?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **ObviousWolf:** shes a…
> 
>  **risefromtheashes:** unicorn!
> 
>  **VampsBeforeTramps:** say wat now
> 
>  **risefromtheashes:** the only 1 of her kind… like a unicorn
> 
>  **LeaveMeAlone:** i feel like u guys r making fun of me
> 
> OR
> 
> The gang decide what supernatural being they would be, Hope is unique and Landon is really fucking weird

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't sleep so here, have another chapter

Saturday

_11:21_

**_group chat ‘Go. To. Sleep!’_ **

**Seductress:** if u were a supernatural being which would u b?

 **LeaveMeAlone:** wat brought this on?

 **Seductress:** idk im bored

 **NerdPower:** srsly peez theres 2 many 2 choose from

 **Seductress:** fine

 **Seductress:** a witch werewolf or vampire choose out of those 3

 **TemperOfAWolf:** werewolf

 **Drama Queen:** i bet no1 saw that coming

**_Seductress has changed TemperOfAWolf’s name to ‘ObviousWolf’_ **

**DoItMyWay:** vamp for me

**_Seductress has changed DoItMyWay’s name to ‘VampsBeforeTramps’_ **

**VampsBeforeTramps:** yo u good at this

 **Seductress:** ik

 **NerdPower:** what about u peez?

 **Seductress:** still deciding

 **Seductress:** alrite queen of mean ur up

 **Drama Queen:** and y should i play along with u?

 **Seductress:** cuz i kno ur secret

 **NerdPower:** wat secret

 **Drama Queen:** urg fine!

 **Drama Queen:** a witch 

_**Seductress has changed Drama Queen’s name to ‘Bitchy witch’** _

**Bitchy witch:** i hate u so much

 **Seductress:** next!

 **NerdPower:** another vamp here

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** good choice man

_**Seductress has changed NerdPower’s name to ‘Baby Vamp’** _

**Baby Vamp:** y am i a baby vamp?

 **Seductress:** cuz i feel like ud be 1

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** id b a phoenix!

 **Bitchy Witch:** that wasnt an option garden gnome

 **Sci-Fi Freak:** but I wanna b a phoenix…

**_Seductress has changed Sci-Fi Freak’s name to ‘risefromtheashes’_ **

**Pantastic:** i guess ill b a witch…

**_Seductress has changed Pantastic’s name to ‘The Enchantress’_ **

**Bitchy witch:** how come I get “bitchy witch” and she gets “enchantress”

 **Seductress:** just cuz

 **Seductress:** hope its ur turn

 **LeaveMeAlone:** do i have 2?

 **The Enchantress:** i feel like hope is a mix of all 3…

 **Seductress:** ik wat u mean

 **Bitchy witch:** shes 2 unique 2 put in2 words…

 **ObviousWolf:** shes a…

 **risefromtheashes:** unicorn!

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** say wat now

 **risefromtheashes:** the only 1 of her kind… like a unicorn

 **LeaveMeAlone:** i feel like u guys r making fun of me

 **Baby Vamp:** no ur just 2 awesome for 1 label 

**The Enchantress:** shes a mix of all 3 like some kind of hybrid

 **Bitchy witch:** shes a…

 **Seductress:** tribrid!!

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** tribrid

 **The Enchantress:** tribrid!

 **ObviousWolf:** tribrid

 **LeaveMeAlone:** um do i get a choice in this?

_**Seductress has changed LeaveMeAlone’s name to ‘Mythical Tribrid’** _

**Bitchy witch:** fcking perfect

 **Bitchy witch:** …

 **Bitchy witch:** I mean the species name thingy…

 **risefromtheashes:** rite…

 **Baby Vamp:** ur turn peez

 **Seductress:** hmm

**_Seductress has changed their name to ‘MysteriousMagic’_ **

**VampsBeforeTramps:** so… which creature r u?

 **MysteriousMagic:** a witch obvious

 **Mythical Tribrid:** im sorry wat was the point of this?

 **MysteriousMagic:** no point 

**MysteriousMagic:** i was just curious

 **The Enchantress:** ofc u were

Sunday

_04:42_

**risefromtheashes:** wat if humans were just a reality show for aliens?

_09:37_

**The Enchantress:** wat were u doing up at 4 in the morning thinking about that kinda shit

 **risefromtheashes:** o i didnt sleep

 **The Enchantress:** y not?

 **Risefromtheashes:** idk

 **The Enchantress:** u should rly get some sleep

 **risefromtheashes:** nah im fine

 **The Enchantress:** if u say so

_12:13_

**ObviousWolf:** seriously lan? u didnt sleep AGAIN!?

_13:02_

**Baby Vamp:** i went over 2 his house but hed already crashed

 **ObviousWolf:** hes gonna make himself sick

_13:26_

**Mythical Tribrid:** honestly i cant judge cuz i sleep like 2 hours and run on 6 cups of coffee

 **Bitchy witch:** u srsly need 2 take better care of urself!

 **Mythical Tribrid:** y do u care

 **Bitchy witch:** w-who said i did

 **Mythical Tribrid:** ooook

Monday

_09:34_

**VampsBeforeTramps:** this chick if yappin on bout who knows wat and im bored as fuck

_09:40_

**Bitchy witch:** maybe u should try listening instead of texting

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** nah im good

 **Bitchy witch:** y do i even bother

_11:02_

**The Entchantress:** mg y did I just c u and kaleb sneaking into the science lab?

_11:13_

**Baby Vamp:** cuz kaleb was caught with his phone in class so now were gonna steal it back

_11:15_

**Bitchy witch:** he shouldve listend 2 me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = Baby Vamp  
> Lizzie Saltzman = Bitchy witch  
> Kaleb Hawkins = VampsBeforeTramps  
> Penelope Park = MysteriousMagic  
> Josie Salzman = The Enchantress  
> Hope Mikaelson = Mythical Tribrid  
> Landon Kirby = risefromtheashes  
> Rafael Waithe = ObviousWolf


	4. dont tell me we have 2 wait til tmw!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **The Enchantress:** ur rly dense hope…
> 
>  **VampsBeforeTramps:** even my gay ass has had a crush on u
> 
>  **VampsBeforeTramps:** it was for like a day but still
> 
>  **Mytical Tribrid:** I uh…. Huh?
> 
>  **Bitchy witch:** i think we broke her…
> 
> OR
> 
> Love is in the air! Landon has a date, and Lizzie accidentally confesses after realizing just how dense Hope is ft. Penelope being a fucking queen!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> four chapters in three days? I'm on a roll!!

Tuesday

_13:11_

**_group chat ‘Go. To. Sleep!'_ **

**risefromtheashes:** heeeeelp meeeee!!!

**_risefromtheashes has renamed the chat ‘GAY PANIC’_ **

**MysteriousMagic:** i didnt care about ur problem til i saw gay panic but now im hooked

 **Bitchy witch:** ooo i love me a good gay panic

 **Baby Vamp:** dont we all?

 **Mythical Tribrid:** question? r we all queer?

 **The Enchantress:** uhh yes…

 **Bitchy witch:** every1 state ur sexuality! bisexual!

 **MysteriousMagic:** bi

 **The Enchantress:** pan but every1 knows that already

 **Baby Vamp:** gay

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** trans and queer reporting for duty

 **Mythical Tribrid:** no label but probably bi or pan

 **ObviousWolf:** im straight but asexual

 **Baby Vamp:** didnt u have sex with lizzie tho?

 **ObviousWolf:** yea and thats how i realized i was ace

 **Bitchy witch:** ah rude!

 **risefromtheashes:** GUYS!!

 **Mythical Tribrid:** rite whats the problem?

 **risefromtheashes:** [JED AKSED ME OIT!!!!!!!!!!!](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21744115/chapters/51874012)

 **ObviousWolf:** WHHHAAATTT!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** they grow up so fast

 **Bitchy witch:** the hobbit managed 2 get a date? im impressed

 **Mystical Tribrid:** isnt jed the guys that use 2 bully u?

 **risefromtheashes:** yae byt he iasd srory!!!!

 **MysteriousMagic:** what?

 **The Enchantress:** calm down before u talk

 **ObviousWolf:** i still dont trust that guy

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** yo whatever man hes cool

 **Baby Vamp:** hes rly not that bad once u get 2 kno him

 **risefromtheashes:** hes really not!! hes amazing!!

 **Bitchy witch:** in love much

 **risefromthashes:** but guys i need help!! what do i wear?

 **risefromtheashes:** how do i act?

 **risefromtheashes:** what even happens on a date!?

 **MysteriousMagic:** calm down dude! i got this

 **MysteriousMagic:** whens the date?

 **risefromtheashes:** friday

 **MysteriousMagic:** plenty of time

 **MysteriousMagic:** ok me kaleb and hope will come shopping with u on thursday and we’ll prep u

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** yo y us?

 **MysteriousMagic:** me cuz I have great taste in clothes u bc ur the gay expert

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** tru

 **MysteriousMagic:** and hope cuz she knows how 2 act cool when people r in love with her

 **Mythical Tribrid:** wait what?

 **MysteriousMagic:** ur the only 1 who knows how 2 act chill even when every1s madly in love with u

 **Mythical Tribrid:** what no i dont! no1s in love with me

 **The Enchantress:** ur rly dense hope…

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** even my gay ass has had a crush on u

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** it was for like a day but still

 **Mytical Tribrid:** I uh…. Huh?

 **Bitchy witch:** i think we broke her…

 **MysteriousMagic:** she’ll be fine

 **MysteriousMagic:** so 4pm thursday dont b late u guys

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** dope

 **risefromtheashes:** tysm

_17:36_

**Mystical Tribrid:** have u all rly had a crush on me at some point?

 **Bitchy witch:** fuckin-

**_Bitchy witch has changed Mystical Tribrid’s name to ‘Definition Of Oblivious’_ **

**Definition Of Oblivious:** so thats a yes…

 **Bitchy witch:** jfc YES

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** even u?

 **Bitchy witch:** are you really so dense that you don’t realize I’m fucking in love with you!!!!!

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** wait what?

 **Bitchy witch:** ,,,

**_Bitchy witch has left the chat_ **

**Definition Of Oblivious:** LIZZIE!?!?

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** fuck how do i add some1 2 the chat!?

**_MysteriousMagic has added Bitchy witch to the chat_ **

**Bitchy witch:** u fucking bitch!!

 **MysteriousMagic:** TALK. TO. HER!!!

 **Bitchy witch:** like im saying anything knowing all u assholes r watching!!!

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** can we private chat??

 **Bitchy witch:** …

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** please?

 **Bitchy witch:** urg fine!!

_17:42_

_**private chat between Bitchy witch and Definition Of Oblivious** _

**Definition Of Oblivious:** ur in love with me

 **Bitchy witch:** … I did say that every1 has had a crush on u at some point so…

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** having a crush on some1 and being in love with some1 r 2 different things i may be oblivious but i kno that much

 **Bitchy witch:** yea well…

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** also im pretty sure every1 is over there crush by now but u made it seem like ur in love with me now…

 **Bitchy witch:** w-well

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** am i wrong?

 **Bitchy witch:** no… not exactly

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** can i come over?

 **Bitchy witch:** no way! Josie keeps looking at me from across the room and u being here will only make things worse!

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** then come over here! My aunts r out tonite and my cousins already asleep so itll just be us!

 **Bitchy witch:** but…

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** dont even try 2 come up with an excuse!

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** cmon please?

 **Bitchy witch:** urg fine!

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** [ty!](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21803518)

  
_18:04_

_**group chat ‘GAY PANIC’** _

**Baby Vamp:** yo what happened?

 **VampBeforeTramps:** dk they just went radio silent

 **MysteriousMagic:** jojo do u know?

 **The Enchantress:** well… she left the room about 20 minutes ago and when I asked where she was going all she said was “either 2 meet my doom or die of happiness” so…

 **risefromtheashes** : so she probably went 2 hopes

 **MysteriousMagic:** dont tell me we have 2 wait til tmw!!

 **The Enchantress:** there prolly still working things out

 **MysteriousMagic:** I KEPT HER SECRET AND WHEN IT COMES 2 LITE IM NOT THE 1ST 2 KNO WHAT HAPPENS!?!?!?

 **Baby Vamp:** calm down peez

 **MysteriousMagic:** this is the worst!

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** relax girl nothin stays secret 4 long

 **MysteriousMagic:** I h8 this so much

Wednesday

_02:47_

_**Bitchy witch has change their name to ‘taken’** _

**Definition Of Oblivious:** rly lizzie?

_07:41_

**MysteriousMagic:** FUCKING FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!


	5. so i take it the d8 went well?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **taken:** OMG U LIKE HER
> 
>  **The Enchantress:** what!?
> 
>  **taken:** U LIKE PENELOPE FUCKING PARK
> 
>  **The Enchantress:** i do not!
> 
>  **taken:** im coming down there!
> 
>  **The Enchantress:** lizzie no!
> 
> OR
> 
> Landon's date arrives, Josie gets jealous, Rafael's worried and Penelope is still a fucking queen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two in one day and its not even noon... well ok its two minutes past noon as I'm writing this but I finished the chapter before noon and I'm posting it literally just after noon so...

Thursday

_16:11_

_**group chat ‘GAY PANIC’** _

**MysteriousMagic:** yo lanlan hurry up would ya

 **risefromtheashes:** lanlan?

 **Baby Vamp:** lol

**_Baby Vamp has changed risefromtheashes’s name to ‘LanLan’_ **

**VampsBeforeTramps:** could u hurry up the girls r getting all emotional

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** we r not

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** rly? 

**VampsBeforeTramps:** *clears throat* Wait so u actually like me? I thought u hated every1 – hope 

**VampsBeforeTramps:** yea well as far as peeps go ur not that bad – penny

 **MysteriousMagic:** if u call that emotional u do not want 2 come 2 girls nite

 **The Enchantress:** we dont have girls nite??

 **MysteriousMagic:** we should

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** back 2 the topic at hand hurry up bro i have other things 2 do tdy

 **LanLan:** im omw mom needed help with shit

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** HURRY UP THERE HUGGING!!!!

 **MysteriousMagic:** if u dont stop complaining ill kiss her next time

 **taken:** u keep ur grubby hands off her!

_16:18_

**_Private chat between taken and The Enchantress_ **

**The Enchantress:** u dont think pen actually likes hope do u

 **taken:** y r u texting me? ur literally just downstairs

 **The Enchantress:** cuz i dont wanna move

 **taken:** fair

 **The Enchantress:** so do u?

 **taken:** penelope park likes anything that moves besides hopes mine so she better stay away

 **The Enchantress:** yea but…

 **taken:** OMG U LIKE HER

 **The Enchantress:** what!?

 **taken:** U LIKE PENELOPE FUCKING PARK

 **The Enchantress:** i do not!

 **taken:** im coming down there!

 **The Enchantress:** lizzie no!

 **taken:** lizzie yes!

Friday

_18:31_

_**group chat ‘GAY PANIC’** _

**LanLan:** aahhhh hes hrer

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** then stop texin us and go get em!

 **The Enchantress:** u got this!

 **Baby Vamp:** going out with guys is a lot easier then girls just an fyi

 **taken:** i feel i should be offended but hes rite

 **ObviousWolf:** i still dont trust him but ily lan so ill try

 **LanLan:** thanks u guys

 **LanLan:** im going!

 **MysteriousMagic:** the love master taught u so ull do fine!

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** as well as the gay master

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** i dont think i rly did anything but good luck

_18:43_

**ObviousWolf:** do u think its going alrite?

 **The Enchantress:** they just left like 10 mins ago calm down ralf

 **ObviousWolf:** im just worried

 **ObviousWolf:** jed was horrible 2 him when they 1st met and…

 **Baby Vamp:** relax jed rly has turned over a new leaf trust me!

 **The Enchantress:** hes rite jeds changed

 **ObviousWolf:** ik ik im being over protective im sry

 **Baby Vamp:** dont be bro jed was a jerk u have every rite 2 be suspicious

 **The Enchantress:** and we’ll keep a close eye on him we wont let him hurt landon

 **ObviousWolf:** thanks u guys

_22:14_

**LanLan:** i think im in love

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** so i take it the d8 went well?

 **LanLan:** it went AMAZING

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** told ya there was nothin 2 worry bout

 **Baby Vamp:** so whered u go?

 **LanLan:** we went bowling then we went back 2 hes place

 **taken:** for a 1st d8 thats the best he could do?

 **The Enchantress:** lizzie

 **LanLan:** u dont get it! The 1st time we ever rly talked was at the bowling ally we ran in2 each other and he apologized and it was rly sweet!

 **The Enchantress:** that is so romantic!

 **taken:** fine i gues thats kinda cute…

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** home boy took u 2 his house on the 1st d8 thats brave

 **LanLan:** it wasnt like that!

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** guys landons demisexual so it mite be a bit soon for that

 **Baby Vamp:** woah rly

 **The Enchantress:** how did u kno that?

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** we used 2 go out remember?

 **LanLan:** anyway we just watched a movie and we may have made out a little…

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** good for u bro

Saturday

_00:49_

**MysteriousMagic:** c! u cant fail when the love master is on ur side!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = Baby Vamp  
> Lizzie Saltzman = taken  
> Kaleb Hawkins = VampsBeforeTramps  
> Penelope Park = MysteriousMagic  
> Josie Salzman = The Enchantress  
> Hope Mikaelson = Definition Of Oblivious  
> Landon Kirby = LanLan  
> Rafael Waithe = ObviousWolf


	6. ur only making things worse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **The Enchantress:** we should do a karaoke nite!
> 
>  **Definition Of Oblivious:** we should not
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** cmon ur a great singer!
> 
>  **VampsBeforeTramps:** uve heard her sing
> 
>  **Definition Of Oblivious:** penenlope!
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** well we were drunk but yes
> 
>  **taken:** y do i not kno about this?
> 
> OR
> 
> Penelope starts drama, Hope is so done and things get real

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = Baby Vamp  
> Lizzie Saltzman = taken  
> Kaleb Hawkins = VampsBeforeTramps  
> Penelope Park = MysteriousMagic  
> Josie Salzman = The Enchantress  
> Hope Mikaelson = Definition Of Oblivious  
> Landon Kirby = LanLan  
> Rafael Waithe = ObviousWolf

Saturday

_18:32_

_**group chat ‘GAY PANIC’** _

**MysteriousMagic:** I'm doin' this tonight

 **LanLan:** what?

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** You're probably gonna start a fight

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** srsly u guys?

 **MysteriousMagic:** I know this can't be right

 **Baby Vamp:** Hey baby, come on

 **LanLan:** what r u guys going on about

 **taken:** I am personally offended that u dont kno

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** I loved you endlessly

 **The Enchantress:** When you weren't there for me

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** u 2 josie?

 **MysteriousMagic:** So now it's time to leave and make it alone

 **LanLan:** is this a song?

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eo-KmOd3i7s>

**Baby Vamp:** I know that I can't take no more

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** It ain't no lie 

**Definition Of Oblivious:** get ready

 **taken:** I want to see you out that door

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** rly?

 **LanLan:** 4 wat

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** wait 4 it

 **MysteriousMagic:** Baby, bi, bi, bi!!!!!

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** Baby, bi, bi, bi!

 **Baby Vamp:** Baby, bi, bi, bi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **The Enchantress:** Baby, bi, bi, bi!!

 **taken:** Baby, bi, bi, bi!!!!!

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** u done?

 **MysteriousMagic:** yep

 **taken:** I would just like 2 say in very frustrated that the hobbit didnt kno the song

 **LanLan:** sry

 **Baby Vamp:** not that i dont luv a good sing a long but wat brought that on peez?

 **MysteriousMagic:** it was stuck in my head so i thought id get in stuck of all ur heads 2

 **The Enchantress:** we should do a karaoke nite!

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** we should not

 **MysteriousMagic:** cmon ur a great singer!

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** uve heard her sing

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** penenlope!

 **MysteriousMagic:** well we were drunk but yes

 **taken:** y do i not kno about this?

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** bc it was like a year ago! Also like u said we were drunk so how could i be good?

 **MysteriousMagic:** idk hope ur singing voice was wat got me in2 ur bed that nite

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** OMG PENELOPE!!

 **taken:** im sorry what?

 **The Enchantress:** WHAT!?!?

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** WE WERE DRUNK!!!

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** daaaamn

 **MyteriousMagic:** best nite of my life

 **Baby Vamp:** um peez what r u tryin 2 do here?

 **Taken:** start drama obviously!

**_VampsBeforeTramps renamed the chat ‘Girl Drama’_ **

**LanLan:** ur only making things worse

_19:04_

**VampsBeforeTramps:** yo whered every1 go?

 **The Enchantress:** um hope came over 2 our house and her and lizzie went 4 a walk

 **Baby Vamp:** and how r u jo?

 **The Enchantress:** what do u mean? im fine this has nothing 2 do with me…

 **Baby Vamp:** …

_19:06_

**_private chat between Baby Vamp and The Enchantress_ **

  
**Baby Vamp:** r u sure ur ok? i kno how u feel about penelope

 **The Enchantress:** whatever I know what shes like she doesnt do romance she does flings

 **Baby Vamp:** still hurts tho rite?

 **The Enchantress:** ofc it does

_19:19_

**_private chat between Definition Of Oblivious and MysteriousMagic_ **

**Definition Of Oblivious:** u shouldnt have done that pen

 **MysteriousMagic:** ik…

 **MysteriousMagic:** i really wasnt trying 2 mess with u and lizzie i was trying 2… u kno

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** convince josie that ur no good 4 her so she’d move on bc ur 2 afraid 2 let her in

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** believe me I get 

**Definition Of Oblivious:** after my parents died i didnt want 2 let any1 in cuz i was afraid of getting hurt

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** but u practically forced ur way in2 my life u didnt give me a choice

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** u let urself in… but josie wont do that penny u have 2 b the 1 2 open up

 **MysteriousMagic:** what if i hurt her?

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** u have 2 take that risk P

 **MysteriousMagic:** …

 **MysteriousMagic:** ill think about it

 **MysteriousMagic:** thanks hope

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** youd do the same 4 me

Monday

_07:23_

**_group chat ‘Girl Drama’_ **

**ObviousWolf:** i leave for the weekend 2 visit my grandparents and decide 2 unplug thinking everything will be fine!

 **ObviousWolf:** then i come back 2 this?

 **ObviousWolf:** wtf guys!?

_07:37_

**LanLan:** its ur falut 4 having so much faith in us

_07:41_

**VampsBeforeTramps:** yo i was just watchin the show

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Help me I can't stop!
> 
> PS. I underlined the lyrics so anyone who hasn't heard the song wouldn't get confused


	7. whatever happened im glad i wasnt apart of it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **VampsBeforeTramps:** for real tho id do her
> 
>  **The Enchantress:** arent u gay?
> 
>  **VampsBeforeTramps:** im 96% gay the other 4% of me is all girl power
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** would just like 2 say she is really good in bed and I would pay a million $ 2 do it again
> 
>  **taken:** stop talking about my girlfriend!
> 
> OR
> 
> Lizzie's whipped, somethings wrong with Hope and an outing at the grill has most of the group in shock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously help me! This is my four chapter of the day
> 
> PS. I tried for like an hour to link an image but I couldn't figure it out, so if you know could you tell me?

Monday

_23:57_

**_group chat ‘Girl Drama’_ **

**taken:**

****

**taken:** I would just like 2 say how utterly infuriating it is that she can look so perfect without even trying!

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** lizzie! u promised u wouldnt send that!

 **MysteriousMagic:** damn hope!

 **The Enchantress:** how does she do that?

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** I literally just woke up!

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** its like almost midnite also u r fiiine girl!

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** omg guys stop!

 **taken:** she hasnt slept in like 2 days so i came over 2 force her 2 sleep

 **taken:** it only lasted about 3 hours but ill take what i can get

 **The Enchantress:** ur as bad as landon

 **Definition Of Oblivious:** im still mad about u posting that pic lizzie!

 **taken:** i wanted 2 show every1 how utterly perfect u r and how much i h8 it!

_**MysteriousMagic has changed Definition Of Oblivious’s name to ‘Utterly Perfect’** _

**Utterly Perfect:** i h8 u

 **MysteriousMagic:** luv u 2

 **Utterly Perfect:** im leaving

 **taken:** she just walked out of the room

 **The Enchantress:** ur still with her?

 **taken:** i was but she just left

 **taken:** pretty sure she just locked herself in the bathroom

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** for real tho id do her

 **The Enchantress:** arent u gay?

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** im 96% gay the other 4% of me is all girl power

 **MysteriousMagic:** would just like 2 say she is really good in bed and I would pay a million $ 2 do it again

 **taken:** stop talking about my girlfriend!

**_VampsBeforeTramps has changed taken’s name to ‘Jealous’_ **

**Jealous:** i am not!

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** uhuh and im white

 **Jealous:** im going 2 find hope!

 **MysteriousMagic:** baaii

 **The Enchantress:** i think u guys upset her…

Tuesday

_00:09_

**_private chat between Jealous and Utterly Perfect_ **

**Jealous:** ur not responding 2 me banging on the door so will u respond 2 my texts?

_00:14_

**Jealous:** y do i hear crying?

00:17

 **Jealous:** i will bust this door down if i have to hope!

_00:34_

**Jealous:** ur aunts came back and told me 2 leave?? I hope ur ok

 **Jealous:** just call if u need anything… I love you

_01:03_

**Utterly Perfect:** I’m really sorry I flaked Lizzie you didn’t do anything wrong I swear

 **Utterly Perfect:** I get like this sometimes I’m really sorry

 **Jealous:** ur using proper grammar and shit so it must be pretty serious

 **Utterly Perfect:** your still up?

 **Jealous:** i was 2 worried about u 2 sleep

 **Jealous:** and should i use proper grammar 2 cuz i feel rly out of place here?

 **Utterly Perfect:** lol no ur fine

 **Jealous:** what happened back there hope?

 **Utterly Perfect:** um… could we call? This isn’t something I feel like explaining over text…

 **Jealous:** of course!

_01:05_

  
**_a call between Jealous and Utterly Perfect started_ **

_02:19_

**_a call between Jealous and Utterly Perfect ended_ **

**_group chat 'Girl Drama'_ **

_10:04_

**The Enchantress:** has any1 seen hope tdy

 **Jealous:** shes not coming

 **LanLan:** y did something happen?

 **Baby Vamp:** its not like hope 2 miss school

 **Jealous:** no idea she just said she wasnt coming

_10:09_

_**private chat between Jealous and Utterly Perfect** _

**Utterly Perfect:** thanks for covering 4 me

 **Jealous:** dont worry about it and if u ever need anything im here

 **Utterly Perfect:** thank you lizzie

_**group chat ‘Girl Drama’** _

_11:21_

**VampsBeforeTramps:** somebody save me from Mr whatshisfaces lecture!!

 **LanLan:** maybe try listening for a change?

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** fuck this shit im out

 **Baby Vamp:** did ya do that on purpose?

 **VampsBeforeTramps:** … i rly dont kno

**_ObviousWolf has changed VampsBeforeTramps’s name to ‘FuckThisShitImOut’_ **

**LanLan:** lmao

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** for real tho im leavin mg u in

 **Baby Vamp:** last time i skipped with u we got caught so no thanks

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** whatever man peace out

 **ObviousWolf:** who wants 2 bet hes gonna get caught?

_16:22_

**MysteriousMagic:** who wants 2 come down 2 the grill with me?

 **The Enchantress:** ill come

 **Baby Vamp:** sure

 **ObviousWolf:** sounds like fun

 **LanLan:** i rly want a milkshake so im in

 **Jealous:** pass

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** I got giving detention so im out

 **ObviousWolf:** u got caught hah?

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** fuck u

 **MysteriousMagic:** is hope still radio silent?

 **Jealous:** not every1 can be on there phone 24:7

 **MysteriousMagic:** u talking about urself again lizzie?

 **Jealous:** u guys have fun at ur little hang out sess

 **MysteriousMagic:** we will now that ur not coming

_18:01_

**The Enchantress:** never again

 **LanLan:** that was the worst thing thats ever happened 2 me

 **Baby Vamp:** y god y!

_18:04_

**FuckThisShitImOut:** damn what the fuck happened 2 u guys?

_18:26_

**Jealous:** whatever happened im glad i wasnt apart of it

 **Jealous:** i knew it was a good idea not 2 go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a cling hanger I know. Just what happened at the grill? Find out next chapter!


	8. well look whos back from the dead!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **MysteriousMagic:** u guys r horrible drunks
> 
>  **LanLan:** IT WAS UR FAULT!!!!
> 
>  **The Enchantress:** also apparently ralf isnt affected by alcohol??
> 
>  **ObviousWolf:** I just have a high tolerance
> 
>  **FuckThisShitImOut:** wat about u mg? any crazy shit happen?
> 
>  **Baby Vamp:** …
> 
> OR
> 
> We find out what happened at the grill, Hope returns and Lizzie and Penelope (reluctantly) team up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not really happy with this chapter but here you go anyway.
> 
> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = Baby Vamp  
> Lizzie Saltzman = Jealous  
> Kaleb Hawkins = VampsBeforeTramps  
> Penelope Park = MysteriousMagic  
> Josie Salzman = The Enchantress  
> Hope Mikaelson = Utterly Perfect  
> Landon Kirby = LanLan  
> Rafael Waithe = ObviousWolf

Wednesday

_07:23_

_**group chat ‘Girl Drama’** _

**FuckThisShitImOut:** so we dont go 2 school with awkward tension in the air would some1 mind tellin me what in the name of god happened ysa

 **Jealous:** josie already told me the very… interesting story of what happened

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** well some1 tell me!

 **Baby Vamp:** penelope drugged us

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** say wat now?

 **MysteriousMagic:** ok I did not “drug u” I simply didnt tell u I put alcohol in ur drinks

 **TheEnchantress:** i will never forgive u! 

**MysteriousMagic:** cmon jojo u were adorable!

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** what happened exactly?

 **Baby Vamp:** apparently when josie gets drunk she gets clingy

 **LanLan:** and possessive. she was following penelope around everywhere

 **Baby Vamp:** and when she tried 2 talk 2 the barista (who was like a 40 year old white dude) she got really possessive and told him to and I quote “fuck the fuck off bc that pussy is mine!”

 **Jealous:** and u guys call me jealous

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** little josie swore that much in 1 sentence! im impressed

 **ObviousWolf:** meanwhile lan was trying 2 pretend he didnt kno us so he full on went 2 some random girls table and sat down and started a convo with her

 **ObviousWolf:** she was about 2 call the cops but mg saved him just in time

 **MysteriousMagic:** u guys r horrible drunks

 **LanLan:** IT WAS UR FAULT!!!!

 **The Enchantress:** also apparently ralf isnt affected by alcohol??

 **ObviousWolf:** I just have a high tolerance

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** wat about u mg? any crazy shit happen?

 **Baby Vamp:** …

 **LanLan:** u kno how ralf said he saved me? He didnt. He sat down with us and told the woman “dont worry girl landons gay ass has a bf so he aint gonna try raping u or nothing”

 **Baby Vamp:** now were banned from the grill for a month and we charged with community service for 2 weeks

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** damn

 **MysteriousMagic:** now there all blaming me can u believe it

 **Jealous:** yes bc its ur fault!!

 **MysteriousMagic:** whatever

_07:53_

**Utterly Perfect:** i just cant leave u guys alone can i?

 **MysteriousMagic:** well look whos back from the dead!

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** i didnt think we were gonna cya again mikaelson

 **LanLan:** u coming 2 school today?

 **Baby Vamp:** I missed the sound of ur voice

 **Utterly Perfect:** ok so… i was never dead, i was only gone for a day, yes but ill be a bit late and u cant here my voice over text  
  
**MysteriousMagic:** fuck i missed u…

 **Utterly Perfect:** again was only gone for a day pen

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** yea but i dont think uve ever missed school so even missin 1 day is weird for u

 **Baby Vamp:** hurry up and get 2 school so I can here ur beautiful voice 

**Utterly Perfect:** ur so weird

 **Utterly Perfect:** my aunts calling me but ill c u guys soon

 **Baby Vamp:** bye!

 **LanLan:** cya

_20:05_

**The Enchantress:** leave me alone!

 **LanLan:** ooook

 **ObviousWolf:** did we do something?

 **The Enchantress:** o sry wrong guys wrong chat!

 **Jealous:** is some1 bothering u cuz i will kill them

 **The Enchantress:** just this guy who cant take a hint its nothing serious

 **MysteriousMagic:** what!? Give me his number!

 **The Enchantress:** no pen its fine rly

_20:07_

**_private chat between Jealous and MysteriousMagic_ **

**MysteriousMagic:** i need ur help

 **Jealous:** um y r u texting me satan?

 **MysteriousMagic:** bc josie mite not think its a big deal but this guy could be trouble

 **MysteriousMagic:** and as much as i hate u i kno u love josie so help me get his number

 **Jealous:** dont u think ur being over dramatic it could be just some guy who has a creepy ass crush on her

 **MysteriousMagic:** im not willing 2 take that chance r u?

 **Jealous:** …

 **Jealous:** fine ill look in2 it but no promises evil 1!

 **MysteriousMagic:** good enough

 **Jealous:** i still hate u tho btw

 **MysteriousMagic:** well duh


	9. i run purely on caffeine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Utterly Perfect:** hey ur the 1 that broke up with me
> 
>  **LanLan:** yes bc im 2 gay 4 u
> 
>  **Utterly Perfect:** lol I thought u were pan
> 
>  **LanLan:** I am but more gay then straight and u r way 2 female 
> 
> **Utterly Perfect:** that doesnt even make any sense!
> 
>  **Utterly Perfect:** doesnt breaking up w/ some1 cuz of there gender kinda defeat the purpose of being pan??
> 
>  **LanLan:** well yea but im not supposed 2 make sense
> 
> OR
> 
> Kaleb, Josie and Landon get some good news, Hope and Landon bond at 4 in the morning and Lizzie goes MIA

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't find a clip of just Landon singing so lets just pretend the video started at 1:26 and ended at 2:52 ok? 
> 
> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = Baby Vamp  
> Lizzie Saltzman = Jealous  
> Kaleb Hawkins = FuckThisShitImOut  
> Penelope Park = MysteriousMagic  
> Josie Salzman = The Enchantress  
> Hope Mikaelson = Utterly Perfect  
> Landon Kirby = LanLan  
> Rafael Waithe = ObviousWolf

Thursday

_19:24_

**_group chat ‘Girl Drama’_ **

**Baby Vamp:** kaleb josie landon! Have i got some new for u!

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** what up

 **Baby Vamp:** u kno the talent show

 **LanLan:** uh the 1 that happened like 4 months ago?

 **Baby Vamp:** yea! They uploaded ur performance 2 youtube

 **The Enchantress:** they did what?

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** whos they?

 **Baby Vamp:** the local tv studio

 **Jealous:** I was in the performance 2! which means im gonna be famous!

 **Utterly Perfect:** no offence babe but i dont think this is about u

 **Jealous:** urg fine! Congrats jo!

 **ObviousWolf:** but lan wasnt even in the talent show???

 **Baby Vamp:** they said he gave them footage of him singing i think?

 **LanLan:** omg i completely forgot about that!

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** was footage?

 **Baby Vamp:** hang on ill show u all 3 of them

_19:31_

**Baby Vamp:** josie- [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARRWML8utAE ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARRWML8utAE)

**Baby Vamp:** kaleb- <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FDNUa7Y4T4A>

**Baby Vamp:** landon- [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6PhkIq3Cbk&t=4s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6PhkIq3Cbk&t=4s)

_19:37_

**MysteriousMagic:** way 2 go jojo

 **Baby Vamp:** any1 else c the split second liz and pen smiled at each other! ground breaking discovery

 **Jealous:** y is landon singing 2 hope?

 **LanLan:** uh cuz this was when we were together

 **Jealous:** ur not a very good singer hobbit

 **LanLan:** gee thanks

 **Baby Vamp:** rlly im digging it

 **MysteriousMagic:** dont hate just cuz ur jealous

 **Jealous:** I. Am not. Jealous!

 **MysteriousMagic:** if u say so

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** how come no1s talking about how fucking talented I am?

Friday

_03:59_

**LanLan:** is any1 else up

 **Utterly Perfect:** im pretty much always up

 **LanLan:** what im getting is we both have horrible sleeping patterns

 **Utterly Perfect:** we did always use 2 stay up talking all nite

 **Utterly Perfect:** but we probably shouldnt talk in the gc bc if we wake lizzie up she will kill us both

_04:01_

**_private chat between LanLan and Utterly Perfect_ **

**LanLan:** im guessing u werent at school yda bc it happened again?

 **Utterly Perfect:** yep

 **Utterly Perfect:** i also told lizzie

 **LanLan:** does that mean i dont have 2 come 2 ur rescue everytime ur aunts arent available 

**Utterly Perfect:** shut up ur the 1 that told me 2 call u!

 **LanLan:** ik im just joking u can call me anytime

 **LanLan:** tho i dont think lizzie would like that

 **Utterly Perfect:** shes just insecure

 **Utterly Perfect:** but im not gonna let her control my life

 **Utterly Perfect:** ur my friend past relationship aside i dont want 2 lose u

 **LanLan:** and u wont

 **LanLan:** just cuz were not together doesnt mean i dont care about u

 **Utterly Perfect:** hey ur the 1 that broke up with me

 **LanLan:** yes bc im 2 gay 4 u

 **Utterly Perfect:** lol I thought u were pan

 **LanLan:** I am but more gay then straight and u r way 2 female 

**Utterly Perfect:** that doesnt even make any sense!

 **Utterly Perfect:** doesnt breaking up w/ some1 cuz of there gender kinda defeat the purpose of being pan??

 **LanLan:** well yea but im not supposed 2 make sense

 **Utterly Perfect:** ok im leaving

 **LanLan:** I LOVE U

 **Utterly Perfect:** uhuh sure

 **LanLan:** HOPE TELL ME U LOVE ME!!!!

 **Utterly Perfect:** bye!

 **LanLan:** but hope my love…

_06:52_

**_group chat 'Girl Drama’_ **

**ObviousWolf:** do u 2 ever sleep

 **LanLan:** nope

 **Utterly Perfect:** i run purely on caffeine

 **ObviousWolf:** im actually starting 2 worry bout u 2

 **LanLan:** more importantly HOPE WONT TELL ME SHE LOVES ME!!!!!!!!!!

 **The Enchantress:** lmao what

 **Utterly Perfect:** he told me I was “2 female” whatever that means and then told me he loved me and tried 2 force me 2 say it back

 **Baby Vamp:** yo when was this?

 **LanLan:** at like 4 in the morning

 **LanLan:** it was late nite bonding

 **Utterly Perfect:** it was him annoying the crap out of me

 **LanLan:** y dont u love me?

 **The Enchantress:** u guys have a rly weird relationship

 **ObviousWolf:** ikr

_06:56_

**_private chat between Jealous and The Enchantress_ **

**The Enchantress:** lizzie r u ok u just stormed out of the room?

 **The Enchantress:** there just joking around u kno

_07:17_

**_group chat ‘Girl Drama’_ **

**MysteriousMagic:** urg i want coffee!

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** then make coffee

 **MysteriousMagic:** i want coffee from the grill!!

 **Utterly Perfect:** u should of thought about that before u got urself banned

 **MysteriousMagic:** hope get me coffee!!

 **Utterly Perfect:** no way!

_09:07_

**Baby Vamp:** peez wanted me 2 tell u that she rly wanted coffee from the grill so she disguised herself but the disguise fell of and they recognised her so now shes done at the police station

_11:18_

**The Enchantress:** i- 

**The Enchantress:** hu-

 **The Enchantress:** what? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm thinking of making a series where I write the in=between scenes. Hizzie getting together, the twins talk about Penelope etc. what do you think?


	10. y do u guys like 2 make me suffer?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **heartbroken:** wait how did u guys kno about that?
> 
>  **LanLan:** …
> 
>  **ObviousWolf:** …
> 
>  **FuckThisShitImOut:** well…
> 
>  **heartbroken:** JOSETTE 
> 
> **The Enchantress:** sorry…
> 
> OR
> 
> Lizzie's still jealous, Hope's still oblivious, Josie's a matchmaker and there's another sing-a-long

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a lot of you seemed to like the idea of me turning this into a series so, a prequel is up if you want to check that out
> 
> PS. since it's a prequel I put the link in the first chapter

Friday

_15:33_

**_group chat ‘Girl Drama’_ **

**Utterly Perfect:** any1 else notice that lizzie was ignoring me all day?

 **MysteriousMagic:** sounds like a win in my book

 **Baby Vamp:** u do kno shes in the chat rite?

 **Utterly Perfect:** was kinda hoping she would yell at me for not realizing her presence or whatever

 **Utterly Perfect:** at least she’d talk 2 me then

 **ObviousWolf:** whatd u do?

 **Utterly Perfect:** idk! Apperently I am fucking oblivious so some1 tell me please!

 **Baby Vamp:** josie

 **Baby Vamp:** lizzie tells josie everything

 **Baby Vamp:** ask josie

 **MysteriousMagic:** she 2 is in the chat u dweeb

 **Baby Vamp:** yea but shes not gonna talk with us (and lizzie) around

_15:37_

_**private chat between The Enchantress and Utterly Perfect** _

**Utterly Perfect:** do u kno?

 **The Enchantress:** idk wat ur talking about

 **Utterly Perfect:** u kno we can tell when ur reading the gc rite?

 **The Enchantress:** ok doesnt mean im going 2 tell u

 **Utterly Perfect:** how am i supposed 2 fix something if u wont tell me whats wrong

 **The Enchantress:** its not ur problem 2 fix!

 **Utterly Perfect:** whos is it? urs? bc it seems 2 always be urs

 **The Enchantress:** im her twin! im the 1 that loves her most

 **Utterly Perfect:** im not doubting that jo but not every problem she has is urs 2 fix

 **The Enchantress:** …

 **The Enchantress:** she doesnt think ur taking her serious

 **Utterly Perfect:** what y?

 **The Enchantress:** bc of penelope and landon

 **Utterly Perfect:** r u serious? 

**The Enchantress:** u should come over… talk it out in personal

 **Utterly Perfect:** what changed ur mind?

 **The Enchantress:** ur rite this isnt my problem 2 fix

_15:42_

**_Group chat 'Girl Drama'_ **

**_The Enchantress has kicked Jealous out of the group_ **

**MysteriousMagic:** yes finally!

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** is there more… girl drama!

 **LanLan:** ur not done with that?

 **Baby Vamp:** this is kaleb were talking bout here

 **ObviousWolf:** truuuu

 **The Enchantress:** guys shut up! lizzies asking y i kicked her out we have 2 be quick

 **MysteriousMagic:** or we could just kick her out for good?

 **The Enchantress:** hope is on her way over but I didnt tell lizzie so just play it cool!

 **LanLan:** im sorry whats going on exactly?

 **The Enchantress:** lizzies jealous hope is oblivious u kno the usual! i just wanted 2 let u kno

 **The Enchantress:** when lizzie comes back shes either gonna be rly happy or really heartbroken so beware!

 **ObviousWolf:** got it

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** either way itll be a good show

_**The Enchantress has deleted 13 messages from the chat** _

_**The Enchantress has added Jealous to the chat** _

**Jealous:** just what on earth were u bitches talking about that u dont want me 2 kno about!!

 **MysteriousMagic:** we were plotting ways 2 kill u. we missed our weekly meeting so we had 2 have it now

 **Jealous:** I h8 every single 1 of u!

_16:02_

_**private chat between Jealous and The Enchantress** _

**Jealous:** I am going 2 kill u

 **The Enchantress:** the is for ur own good liz

 **Jealous:** I hate u!

 **The Enchantress:** luv u 2

_16:57_

_**group chat ‘Girl Drama’** _

**_Jealous has renamed themselves ‘heartbroken’_ **

**Baby Vamp:** o no did it not go well

 **MysteriousMagic:** did hope inevitably break ur heart?

 **heartbroken:** uh no she wont get me food

 **Utterly Perfect:** i dont wanna get up anymore then u do

 **heartbroken:** wait how did u guys kno about that?

 **LanLan:** …

 **ObviousWolf:** …

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** well…

 **heartbroken:** JOSETTE 

**The Enchantress:** sorry…

**_Utterly Perfect has changed The Enchantress’s name to ‘Matchmaker’_ **

**heartbroken:** HOPE ANDREA MIKAELSON

 **Utterly Perfect:** what shes good at what she does

 **MysteriousMagic:** so jojo who u gonna matchmake next… us perhaps

 **Matchmaker:** im good thanks

Saturday

_09:05_

**_FuckThisShitImOut has changed the chat name to ‘Oh Christmas Tree Oh Christmas Tree’_ **

**ObviousWolf:** gettin in 2 the holiday spirit i c

 **LanLan:** fuck yes!

 **MysteriousMagic:** christmas sing along!

 **Utterly Perfect:** noooo

 **MysteriousMagic:** yeeeees

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** I don't want a lot for Christmas

 **Utterly Perfect:** nope nope nope

 **Matchmaker** : There is just one thing I need

 **LanLan:** I don't care about the presents

 **heartbroken:** at least he knows this 1

 **MysteriousMagic:** Underneath the Christmas tree

 **Baby Vamp:** I don't need to hang my stocking

 **heartbroken:** There upon the fireplace

 **Utterly Perfect:** y do u guys like 2 make me suffer?

 **ObviousWolf:** Santa Claus won't make me happy

 **MysteriousMagic:** ur turn hopey

 **Utterly Perfect:** im good thanks

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** do it

 **Baby Vamp:** do it

 **heartbroken:** do it

 **LanLan:** do it

 **Utterly Perfect:** i h8 all of u

 **Matchmaker:** pleeeaaase

 **Utterly Perfect:** …

 **Utterly Perfect:** With a toy on Christmas Day

 **Baby Vamp:** eeeehhhh

 **MysteriousMagic:** thats my girl!

 **Utterly Perfect:** just keep going

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** I just want you for my own

 **Matchmaker:** More than you could ever know

 **LanLan:** Make my wish come true

 **MysteriousMagic:** All I want for Christmas iiiissss…

 **Baby Vamp:** YOUUUU

 **heartbroken:** yooouuuu

 **ObviousWolf:** youuu

 **Utterly Perfect:** i did 1 line im not doing another

 **MysteriousMagic:** we r having an irl christmas sing-a-long and u r participating and then u and the queen of mean will bang bc no1 can resist u after hearing u sing

 **Utterly Perfect:** PENELOPE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know! This was another Hizzie based chapter I promise Posie and some other plot is coming very soon! I promise!


	11. be sappy in private would ya

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **LanLan:** never liked that guy
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** hope? Any feelings getting stirred up?
> 
>  **Utterly Perfect:** y would i have feelings getting stirred up p? Roman and i d8ed like 3 years ago
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** ik i was hoping 2 make lizzie jealous
> 
>  **heartbroken:** wouldnt work. Honestly i would leave her 4 roman so i wouldnt blame her if feelings go “stirred up”
> 
>  **Utterly Perfect:** gee thanks
> 
> OR
> 
> Lizzie and Penelope start their plan, Kaleb has a date, and a guest star has everyone very confused (including the author who's just making up the plot as she goes along)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = Baby Vamp  
> Lizzie Saltzman = heartbroken  
> Kaleb Hawkins = FuckThisShitImOut  
> Penelope Park = MysteriousMagic  
> Josie Salzman = Matchmaker  
> Hope Mikaelson = Utterly Perfect  
> Landon Kirby = LanLan  
> Rafael Waithe = ObviousWolf

Sunday

_12:16_

_**private chat between heartbroken and MysteriousMagic** _

**heartbroken:** update: josie wouldnt spill anything so I stole her phone when she was helping mom with dinner and that guy is a total creep!

 **MysteriousMagic:** u take pics?

 **heartbroken:** ah ofc

 **heartbroken:** [creepyassdick.jpg]

 **heartbroken:** there r a lot more but u get the point

 **MysteriousMagic:** y doesnt she just leave

 **heartbroken:** dont ask me she probably thinks she’ll b the mean 1 if she does u kno how josie can b

 **MysteriousMagic:** damn it jojo

 **MysteriousMagic:** how am i supposed 2 protect her when she wont protect herself

 **heartbroken:** we can talk about ur completely obvious and very disturbing feelings about my sister later

 **heartbroken:** rite now we need 2 protect her from mr creepy

 **MysteriousMagic:** ok yea fine

 **MysteriousMagic:** but later rite now i have a study d8

 **heartbroken:** uh with who?

 **MysteriousMagic:** with ur sister obviously! she told me not 2 call it a d8 but it totally is

 **heartbroken:** uh gross!

 **MysteriousMagic:** later!

_15:41_

_**group chat ‘Oh Christmas Tree Oh Christmas Tree’** _

**FuckThisShitImOut:** guess who has a d8

 **Baby Vamp:** rly who?

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** roman

 **ObviousWolf:** hopes ex?

 **LanLan:** never liked that guy

 **MysteriousMagic:** hope? Any feelings getting stirred up?

 **Utterly Perfect:** y would i have feelings getting stirred up p? Roman and i d8ed like 3 years ago

 **MysteriousMagic:** ik i was hoping 2 make lizzie jealous

 **heartbroken:** wouldnt work. Honestly i would leave her 4 roman so i wouldnt blame her if feelings go “stirred up”

 **Utterly Perfect:** gee thanks

 **Baby Vamp:** honestly that guy is fucking amazing!

 **ObviousWolf:** hes hot thats 4 sure. im straight and even i can c that

 **LanLan:** still dont like him

 **Matchmaker:** hes rly sweet tho y dont u like him landon?

 **Utterly Perfect:** bc hes an insecure lil bean who thought i was going 2 leave him 4 roman

 **Utterly Perfect:** and hes feelings have just followed him throughout time

 **Baby Vamp:** that was very… observant of u hope

 **Baby Vamp:** but damn every1s getting laid but me

 **ObviousWolf:** im not

 **Matchmaker:** neither am i

 **Utterly Perfect:** add me 2 the club bc lizzie wants 2 wait

 **Utterly Perfect:** i mean its not that big of a deal but still im in the club

 **heartbroken:** I have learnt that when u rush in2 sex people do crazy things lie dump u on ur birthday! so…

 **ObviousWolf:** i said i was sorry!

 **Utterly Perfect:** like i said unlike these sex driven creatures its not that big of a deal

 **Utterly Perfect:** ofc I want 2 but im not ready until ur ready

 **MysteriousMagic:** be sappy in private would ya

_18:28_

**LanLan:** What’s this? Some kind of… group chat?

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** u on drugs or something bro

 **ObviousWolf:** u feelin ok lan?

 **LanLan:** I’m feeling fine. Just thought I’d see who my little brother spends his time with

 **Matchmaker:** brother?

 **Utterly Perfect:** o no

 **Utterly Perfect:** no nope nope NO

 **Utterly Perfect:** i am not dealing with this

**_Utterly Perfect has left the chat_ **

**FuckThisShitImOut:** um ok what?

 **LanLan:** I’m guessing that was Hope

**_heartbroken has added Utterly Perfect to the chat_ **

**heartbroken:** u better tell us what the hell is going on rite now hope mikaelson!

 **Utterly Perfect:** if i were u i would leave while u still can

 **Matchmaker:** ok now im rly confused…

 **LanLan:** My name is Clarke, I’m Landon’s older, and better looking, brother and Hope and I have a bit of a bumpy history

 **ObviousWolf:** dont tell me u fell for her?

 **Matchmaker:** we’ve all been there

 **heartbroken:** let me guess? she left u for the hobbit and now u h8 ur brother and hope

 **LanLan:** Listen I don’t know what you high schoolers are going on about but Hope and I have never banged

 **Utterly Perfect:** thank god

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** then what happened 2 make her h8 u so much

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** i mean its pretty easy but still

 **LanLan:** Hope here, left me to die

 **Utterly Perfect:** he’s being overdramatic i simply left him across the country with no money and no way to get home 

**ObviousWolf:** wait what

 **Utterly Perfect:** only bc! he literally tried 2 kill me

 **LanLan:** Now who’s being overdramatic

 **LanLan:** I just tricked you into going down an alleyway

 **Utterly Perfect:** THEY HAD GUNS U PSYCHOPATH

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** wow did hope just yell?

 **Matchmaker:** thats a 1st

 **heartbroken:** wait…

 **heartbroken:** omg

 **ObviousWolf:** what?

 **heartbroken:** Whoever you are you better stay the hell away from my girlfriend or you’ll have to deal with me and I can be very scary when I want to be!

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** daamn white girl

 **Matchmaker:** she used proper grammar... this cant be good

_18:44_

**_private chat between heartbroken and Utterly Perfect_ **

**heartbroken:** stay where u r im coming over!

 **Utterly Perfect:** no lizzie im fine

 **heartbroken:** this is none negotiable hope! 

**Utterly Perfect:** ur gonna come no matter what i say arent u?

 **heartbroken:** yes

 **Utterly Perfect:** thanks lizzie

_**group chat ‘Oh Christmas Tree Oh Christmas Tree’** _

**19:06**

**LanLan:** he didnt

 **ObviousWolf:** yo lan is that rly u this time?

 **LanLan:** wheres hope

 **Matchmaker:** um well lizzie went over 2 her house so im guessing at home??

 **LanLan:** lizzies with her? ok thats good

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** mind tellin us whats going on?

 **LanLan:** its not my place 2 say

 **Matchmaker:** hopes ok tho rite?

 **LanLan:** lizzies with her so she should be fine

_22:52_

**Baby Vamp:** yo what the hell happened?

 **MysteriousMagic:** u turn ur phone of for 1 evening 2 get some studying done (mgs idea not mine) and return 2 find out world war 3 started wtf u guys!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, it's like 1am and I'm tired but I had this idea and I knew if I didn't write it know I would lose the inspiration so sorry if it sucks. Second, I know Kaleb and Roman is a weird pairing (have they even met in canon?) but I wanted to pair Kaleb up with someone temporarily before... oops spoilers. Anyway it was either him or Sebastian and I couldn't see the two of them banging so, Roman it was (also is anyone else in love with Roman or is it just me?). As for Clarke, I love his character and I don't think he's evil but he is a bit of a dick, so for the sake of the story I've made him the bad guy.


	12. the rest of u r in for it!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **MysteriousMagic:** listen up gang!
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** i have convinced the hope mikaelson! 2 do karaoke w/ us
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** it was at a cost… but ive done it!
> 
>  **FuckThisShitImOut:** woop woop!
> 
>  **LanLan:** i have 2 go pick out a song!
> 
>  **Baby Vamp:** i- i didnt think this day would ever come!
> 
> OR
> 
> Hope tells the gang what's been going on, Penelope convinces her to do karaoke but at a cost and Lizzie has a candy cane addiction

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 of my in between series is up, link is in chapter 4.

Monday

_15:42_

**_group chat ‘Oh Christmas Tree Oh Christmas Tree’_ **

**ObviousWolf:** any1 else rly confused?

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** u mean about that science test we did today or the fact that hope landon and lizzie r acting hella weird

 **LanLan:** funny thing about a gc

 **LanLan:** when ur talking about other people in the gc they can also read it!

 **Baby Vamp:** then tell us wats goin on

 **LanLan:** i already told u! its not my place 2 say

 **Matchmaker:** guys maybe u should just leave it?

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** do u kno wats goin on? lizzie does tell u everything

 **Matchmaker:** no she didnt tell me and I didnt ask bc its none of our business

 **Baby Vamp:** maybe shes rite guys

 **Baby Vamp:** if it was that important hope wouldve told us by now

 **ObviousWolf:** or maybe she doesnt want us 2 worry! u kno how hope can b 

**FuckThisShitImOut:** well whatever when yall decide what we’re gonna do call me

 **Matchmaker:** just leave it alone guys

_17:24_

**heartbroken:** u guys suck at secret convos

 **Matchmaker:** srry lizzie

 **heartbroken:** ur the only 1 im not mad at jo

 **heartbroken:** the rest of u r in for it!

 **Baby Vamp:** please god! save me!!

 **LanLan:** what did i do?

 **heartbroken:** ur the reason they kno somethings up in the 1st place!

 **LanLan:** how

 **heartbroken:** u said and i quote “its not my place 2 say” meaning! that there is indeed something 2 say

 **LanLan:** What!?

 **Utterly Perfect:** lizzie its fine

 **heartbroken:** u sure?

 **Utterly Perfect:** no but they deserve 2 kno

 **Baby Vamp:** deserve 2 kno what?

 **Utterly Perfect:** meet me in the town square at 8?

 **Utterly Perfect:** and make sure the others r there. this isnt something i want 2 explain twice

 **Matchmaker:** ok if ur sure… we’ll be there

_17:28_

**_private chat between heartbroken and Utterly Perfect_ **

**heartbroken:** r u 100% sure about this??

 **Utterly Perfect:** yes! they deserve 2 kno

 **heartbroken:** if ur sure then

 **Utterly Perfect:** i am

_17:29_

**_private chat between LanLan and Utterly Perfect_ **

**LanLan:** u sure about this

 **Utterly Perfect:** geez the 2 of u need 2 calm down

 **LanLan:** were just worried

 **Utterly Perfect:** i kno but u dont need 2 be im fine promise

 **LanLan:** ok ok

_19:09_

**_private chat between MysteriousMagic and Utterly Perfect_ **

**MysteriousMagic:** karaoke nite. friday. u in?

 **Utterly Perfect:** no

 **MysteriousMagic:** karaoke nite will make u feel better!

 **Utterly Perfect:** no it will not

 **Utterly Perfect:** in fact itll make me feel 10 times worse

 **MysteriousMagic:** cmon i even have song choices for u!

 **Utterly Perfect:** u mean i dont even get 2 choose the song?

 **MysteriousMagic:** well ull get 2 choose out of 3…

 **Utterly Perfect:** no way in hell

 **MysteriousMagic:** cmon! I’ll owe u!

 **Utterly Perfect:** … ok i’ll do it. on 1 condition 

**MysteriousMagic:** hit me

 **Utterly Perfect:** at this karaoke nite ur so excited for u have 2 sing a love song 2 josie

 **MysteriousMagic:** …

 **MysteriousMagic:** u kno wat i changed my mind! who needs karaoke anyway?

 **Utterly Perfect:** oh no! we’re doing it! 

**Utterly Perfect:** and u have 2 make it very clear ur singing 2 her and only her.

 **MysteriousMagic:** ur enjoying this

 **Utterly Perfect:** paybacks a bitch

 **MysteriousMagic:** FINE

 **Utterly Perfect:** c u friday

_19:17_

**_group chat ‘Oh Christmas Tree Oh Christmas Tree’_ **

**MysteriousMagic:** listen up gang!

 **MysteriousMagic:** i have convinced the hope mikaelson! 2 do karaoke w/ us

 **MysteriousMagic:** it was at a cost… but ive done it!

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** woop woop!

 **LanLan:** i have 2 go pick out a song!

 **Baby Vamp:** i- i didnt think this day would ever come!

 **ObviousWolf:** wats the cost?

 **Utterly Perfect:** oh ull c

 **Matchmaker:** this is gonna be fun… and chaotic 

**heartbroken** : it usually is with these idiots

 **MysteriousMagic:** get ready 2 orgasm lizzie!

 **Utterly Perfect:** PENELOPE!!

Tuesday

_06:32_

**_heartbroken has changed their name to ‘CandyCaneHigh’_ **

**Baby Vamp:** lmao wat?

 **Matchmaker:** she found a bunch of candy canes when she got up at 4 in the morning 2 get a drink and now shes got a candy cane high

 **Utterly Perfect:** dont come 2 school high

 **CandyCaneHigh:** but there so _good_

 **Matchmaker:** she literally ate the whole packet

 **Baby Vamp:** b safe liz

 **Utterly Perfect:** yea 

**Utterly perfect:** candy canes r serious stuff

_06:16_

**MysteriousMagic:** ok so… i want 2 make fun of u lizzie but honestly who doesnt love a good candy cane high?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't think this is one of my best chapters but oh well.
> 
> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = Baby Vamp  
> Lizzie Saltzman = CandyCaneHigh  
> Kaleb Hawkins = FuckThisShitImOut  
> Penelope Park = MysteriousMagic  
> Josie Salzman = Matchmaker  
> Hope Mikaelson = Utterly Perfect  
> Landon Kirby = LanLan  
> Rafael Waithe = ObviousWolf


	13. listen and choose 1 my darling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **FuckThisShitImOut:** 1st of all fuck u
> 
>  **FuckThisShitImOut:** and 2nd i never said we were gonna let them off the hook
> 
>  **Mysteriousmagic:** …
> 
>  **CandyCaneHigh:** go on…
> 
>  **FuckThisShitImOut:** well were gonna need some dirt on these guys
> 
>  **Utterly Perfect:** u kno blackmail is illegal rite?
> 
> OR
> 
> Kaleb is really good at scheming, Penelope and Hope really do have feelings and the gang shows just how protective they are of one another

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be a light and funny story but I have too many emotions for that shit so here, have another deep ass chapter

Tuesday

_16:49_

**_group chat ‘Oh Christmas Tree Oh Christmas Tree’_ **

**LanLan:** u kno what i h8? homophobes 

**Baby Vamp:** ikr! there the worst!

 **MysteriousMagic:** how bout we gather all the queers in the world and lock all the homophobes up!

 **Utterly Perfect:** does that make us any better then them?

 **Matchmaker:** hopes rite. anyway did something happen landon

 **LanLan:** I was out with jed and these guys from school saw us and jeds not out yet so…

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** there gonna out him arent they?

 **Utterly Perfect:** changed my mind but instead of locking them up lets kill them

 **MysteriousMagic:** fuck yea!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** people call me crazy. people r rite

 **CandyCaneHigh:** lets do it

 **Baby Vamp:** im a pacifist but im rlly mad rite now so im in

 **Matchmaker:** srsly u guys?

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** or we could come up with another way?

 **ObviousWolf:** is it just me or did kaleb sound kinda reasonable there

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** 1st of all fuck u

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** and 2nd i never said we were gonna let them off the hook

 **Mysteriousmagic:** …

 **CandyCaneHigh:** go on…

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** well were gonna need some dirt on these guys

 **Utterly Perfect:** u kno blackmail is illegal rite?

 **Obvious Wolf:** they hurt landon so i dont rlly care if its illegal do u?

 **Matchmaker:** i guess its better then killing them…

 **Baby Vamp:** so who was it exactly?

 **LanLan:** who do u think? connor and his puppets

 **Obvious Wolf:** of fucking course!

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** ok then we’ll split in2 teams

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** me mg and rafael will go after connor himself

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** lizzie hope penelope and josie u go after dana cuz lets face it shes almost worse then he is

 **LanLan:** what about me? there going after _my_ boyfriend u kno

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** meaning theyll be suspicious of u

 **LanLan:** theyll be suspicious of all of us!

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** dana wont be suspicious of penelope she’ll distract her while the other girls find dirt

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** us boys r on the football team w/ connor he’ll be suspicious of rafael since hes so close w/ landon mg cant lie 2 save his life i on the other hand am great at it so ill be the distraction and the snoop

 **Utterly perfect:** woah

 **MysteriousMagic:** jesus that was amazing

 **Matchmaker:** uve actually thought this through

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** listen hoes im rly fucking good at schemes

 **CandyCaneHigh:** ok then… 

**ObviousWolf:** so when do we start?

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** tmw at morning break

 **Baby Vamp:** u want us 2 do this in 20 mins!?

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** well they will get suspicious if we talk 2 them 2 long

 **CandyCaneHigh:** question y dont we wait til there at practice? We wouldnt even have 2 distract them

 **Obvious Wolf:** our team has practice as well

 **Utterly Perfect:** and jo and I have student council on wednesdays

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** leaving only u and penelope left

 **CandyCaneHigh:** urg fine! we’ll do it during break

 **LanLan:** ty guys 

_18:23_

**_private chat between MysteriousMagic and Utterly Perfect_ **

**MysteriousMagic:** ok so i have 3 songs for u 2 choose out of for friday

 **MysteriousMagic:** <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBDHnPg1qh4>

**MysteriousMagic:** <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uk6RS7KWF2U>

**MysteriousMagic:** <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vH9FjGZ_Oc>

**MysteriousMagic:** listen and choose 1 my darling

_18:34_

**Utterly Perfect:** penelope y r these all rly sad and depressing songs?

 **MysteriousMagic:** uh cuz i want u 2 have a mental breakdown duh

 **Utterly Perfect:** jfc my best friend is a sadist

 **MysteriousMagic:** no i just… want u 2 stop pretending ur ok all the time

 **Utterly Perfect:** what r u talking about

 **MysteriousMagic:** the other day u let us in for the 1st time ever and u admitted u werent ok

 **MysteriousMagic:** u should admit it more often

 **Utterly perfect:** so y did u choose the songs out for me? doesnt that kinda defeat the purpose?

 **MysteriousMagic:** i chose songs that i think represent u

 **MysteriousMagic:** also! i spent hours on yt 2 find these songs so be grateful bitch

 **Utterly Perfect:** ok fine! ill choose 1

 **MysteriousMagic:** yeees

 **Utterly perfect:** but u should start looking for ur own song 2 sing 2 a certain brunette

 **MysteriousMagic:** urg dont remind me!

 **Utterly perfect:** thanks P ily… even if u r a asshole

 **MysteriousMagic:** ily2… even if u r a bitch who doesnt kno how feelings work

_22:16_

**_group chat ‘Oh Christmas Tree Oh Christmas Tree’_ **

**LanLan:** so um…

_**LanLan has added Jed to the chat** _

**CandyCaneHigh:** u didnt just…

 **Matchmaker:** he did

 **MysteriousMagic:** u do kno ur supposed 2 ask the rest of us rite?

 **Baby Vamp:** rule 1! dont add peeps 2 the chat without asking the rest of us! everybody knows this

 **Utterly Perfect:** luckily raf goes 2 sleep at 10

 **CandyCaneHigh:** that was only 18 mins ago

 **MysteriousMagic:** we sure hes asleep?

 **Baby Vamp:** i sure hope so...

 **Jed:** im rly sry for dropping in like this its just landon told me wat u doing for me and i just wanted 2 say thank u

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** hold up is he usin that sorta language thinkin were friends

 **Matchmaker:** we arent doing it for u

 **Utterly Perfect:** dont think we’ve forgotten about last year

 **CandyCaneHigh:** landon may be a sock puppet but hes 1 of us and as the saying goes u mess with 1 of us u mess with all of us

 **MysteriousMagic:** yes u may be hot 

**MysteriousMagic:** yes i helped landon get ready for ur 1st d8

 **MysteriousMagic:** and YES u may smell amazing!

 **Baby Vamp:** ok peez getting off topic

 **LanLan:** guys could u lay off!

 **Jed:** no its ok i deserve it

 **Jed:** listen im rly srry with the way I treated landon last year. I dont deserve ur forgiveness but at least believe me when i say i truly care about landon

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** hope rafael isnt here so u kno landon best its ur call

 **Utterly Perfect:** there r some rules

 **Jed:** anything

 **Utterly Perfect:** number 1 u have 2 make sure its ok with rafael 1st if not u leave

 **Jed:** understood

 **Utterly Perfect:** number 2 if u hurt landon in any way we will all make u suffer in ways uve never imagined 

**Jed:** got it

 **Utterly Perfect:** and number 3 u do not under any circumstances judge any of us in any way

 **Utterly perfect:** we r all crazy and messed up in 1 way or another but this gc chaotic and stupid as it may be is a safe place if u ruin that safe place in any way u will never be forgiven

 **Jed:** yes ma’am

 **Utterly Perfect:** thats it

 **MysteriousMagic:** wait! 1 more from me! 

**Jed:** ok…

 **MysteriousMagic:** that boring ass name… has got 2 go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually did scour youtube to find songs that describe Hope. Also It's On Us by AJR is now my unofficial theme song for legacies. Anyway I can't choose which one, so if you could have a listen to them (if you aren't familiar already) and help me choose for the karaoke fic I'll be writing in the future that'd be a big help. You can also leave song suggestions for Penelope or any other character you want to. Besides from Hope and Penelope I can't promise I'll write them performing the song because it would take up way to much time to write one for all of them, but leave your suggestions and you never know.


	14. thank u both for proving my point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **CandyCaneHigh:** hope im leaving u 4 ur ex
> 
>  **Utterly Perfect:** srsly?
> 
>  **CandyCaneHigh:** im sry but… romans my soulmate
> 
>  **Matchmaker:** roman is every1s soulmate liz
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** the way he saved us back there… uh
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** maybe I can convince him 2 leave kaleb and have some fun w/ me ;)
> 
> OR
> 
> Jed adjusts to the craziness that is; this chat, everybody loves Roman and Hope is sick of everyone's shit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just watched the sneak peak(s) and I am hyped! Hope doesn't seem to be in the holiday spirit also, I can see why she has to team up with Clarke I mean, no one is listening to her! l won't be able to watch it when it airs but I made my sister promise to record it so when I get home legacies midseason finale here I come! But until then, here's another chapter.

Wednesday

_06:48_

**_group chat ‘Oh Christmas Tree Oh Christmas Tree’_ **

**ObviousWolf:** ur kidding rite?

_07:17_

**Baby Vamp:** knew he’d say something like that

_07:29_

**Utterly Perfect:** just give him a chance ralf

 **ObviousWolf:** u saying u trust him?

 **Utterly Perfect:** im saying that every1 deserves a 2nd chance

 **Utterly Perfect:** and if thats not good enough for u then try for landon

 **ObviousWolf:** 1 wrong move and hes out

 **Utterly Perfect:** already made that perfectly clear

 **ObviousWolf:** 1 chance he gets 1. more. chance

_07:34_

**Jed:** I rly appreciate it rafael

 **ObviousWolf:** im not doing it for u

 **Jed:** ik

**07:37**

**MysteriousMagic:** now that thats cleared up we need a name… a catchy name

 **CandyCaneHigh:** how bout ‘loverofmayonnaise’

 **LanLan:** am i the mayonnaise? 

**CandyCaneHigh:** well duh

 **Baby Vamp:** o what about ‘ATotalTop’

 **LanLan:** um rude!

 **Jed:** w-what?

 **Utterly Perfect:** oh dont worry a weird name is a compliment

 **Jed:** ok…

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** i personally like ‘100% would do’

 **CandyCaneHigh:** u man whore

 **MysteriousMagic:** im gonna go w/...

**_MysteriousMagic has changed Jed's name to 'TopDog'_ **

**Baby Vamp:** ehh!

 **Utterly Perfect:** well now that that's sorted imma head 2 school cya

 **CandyCaneHigh:** walk by my house im almost ready

 **Utterly Perfect:** last time u said that I was waiting half an hour

 **CandyCaneHigh:** yea well this time i mean it

 **Utterly Perfect:** ur lucky ur cute

 **CandyCaneHigh:** i am arent i

 **TopDog** : there together arent they?

 **MysteriousMagic:** wanna help me break them up?

 **TopDog** : wait y?

 **MysteriousMagic:** cuz lizzie would be crushed

 **TopDog** : isnt she ur friend??

 **Matchmaker:** ignore her

 **MysteriousMagic:** ur words wound me jojo

 **Matchmaker:** whatever p ur fine

 **MysteriousMagic:** well only cuz ur talking 2 me

 **TopDog** : so u 2 r together as well?

 **Matchmaker:** what! no!

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** theyve been in love for 2 years but josie denies it and penelope plays it off as a joke cuz there both 2 scared

 **Matchmaker:** i am not! there is nothing between us!

 **MysteriousMagic:** ofc there is jojo! dont lie 2 urself! no1 can resist me after all

 **Baby Vamp:** yea kinda like that…

 **FuckThisShitImOut:** thank u both for proving my point

_09:45_

**_Baby Vamp has changed FuckThisShitImOut’s name to ‘GodOfSchemes’_ **

**GodOfSchemes:** u werent 2 bad urself man

**_Baby Vamp has changed their name to ‘SlyFox’_ **

**GodOfSchemes:** u were pretty sly

 **SlyFox:** thanks dude

 **ObviousWolf:** i helped 2 just an fyi 

_09:51_

**CandyCaneHigh:** hope im leaving u 4 ur ex

 **Utterly Perfect:** srsly?

 **CandyCaneHigh:** im sry but… romans my soulmate

 **Matchmaker:** roman is every1s soulmate liz

 **MysteriousMagic:** the way he saved us back there… uh

 **MysteriousMagic:** maybe I can convince him 2 leave kaleb and have some fun w/ me ;)

 **Utterly Perfect:** stop

 **GodOfSchemes:** hes all urs sister it was a 1 time thing but damn… he is soo good like fuck man

 **Utterly Perfect:** nope dont wanna hear this

 **TopDog** : wat is happening

 **LanLan:** hope and roman use 2 d8 but now she sees him as only a friend now but he took her virginity so…

 **MysteriousMagic:** he was ur 1st? lucky!!

 **Utterly Perfect:** im going 2 class

 **CandyCaneHigh:** how bout we set up a threesome??

 **Utterly Perfect:** im never talking 2 u again!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** just think about it k??

_12:03_

**ObviousWolf:** i think lizzie is actually gonna leave hope for roman…

 **Utterly Perfect:** yea so do i

 **LanLan:** whats she doing?

 **Utterly Perfect:** flirting… with him not me

 **MysteriousMagic:** that bitch! i called dibs!

 **ObviousWolf:** ok so… hope and i r the only 1s who dont wanna get in 2 bed with this guy is wat im getting…

 **Utterly Perfect:** we broke up cuz hes like a brother 2 me so…

 **MysteriousMagic:** im starting 2 c a trend with the people u d8

 **LanLan:** omg yes!

 **ObviousWolf:** She d8s peeps then they turn in2 her siblings!!

 **MysteriousMagic:** so guess this means lizzies gonna be ur sister

 **Utterly Perfect:** no nope i cant deal w/ this

 **Utterly Perfect:** im leaving 

**Utterly Perfect:** u guys r just 2 much 4 me!

**_Utterly Perfect has left the chat_ **

**MysteriousMagic:** that was overdramatic

 **LanLan:** lol i wish the others were here 2 c this

**_ObviousWolf has added Utterly Perfect to the chat_ **

**Utterly Perfect:** kill me now

  
_15:14_

**CandyCaneHigh:** fine i promise i wont bang roman unless its in a threesome!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought you guys could use a fun chapter after the emotional one we just had, so apart from the start, this is all fun and games.
> 
> Characters + Their Usernames  
> Milton “MG” Greasley = SlyFox  
> Lizzie Saltzman = CandyCaneHigh  
> Kaleb Hawkins = GodOfSchemes  
> Penelope Park = MysteriousMagic  
> Josie Salzman = Matchmaker  
> Hope Mikaelson = Utterly Perfect  
> Landon Kirby = LanLan  
> Rafael Waithe = ObviousWolf  
> Jed = TopDog


	15. that was very poetic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **GodOfSchemes:** wat were u hoes even talkin bout!?!?
> 
>  **Utterly Perfect:** uhh...
> 
>  **CandyCaneHigh:** boys
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** girls
> 
>  **LanLan:** straights
> 
>  **ObviousWolf:** gays
> 
>  **TopDog:** um…
> 
>  **Matchmaker:** jfc
> 
> OR
> 
> MG has a crush, Penelope creates another group chat and Josie might be in deep trouble

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be up yesterday but life got in the way
> 
> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = SlyFox  
> Lizzie Saltzman = CandyCaneHigh  
> Kaleb Hawkins = GodOfSchemes  
> Penelope Park = MysteriousMagic  
> Josie Salzman = Matchmaker  
> Hope Mikaelson = Utterly Perfect  
> Landon Kirby = LanLan  
> Rafael Waithe = ObviousWolf  
> Jed = TopDog

Thursday

_18:07_

**_group chat ‘Oh Christmas Tree Oh Christmas Tree’_ **

**SlyFox:** i cant take it anymore!

_**SlyFox has removed GodOfSchemes from the chat** _

**MysteriousMagic:** intriguing

 **ObviousWolf:** y do we keep removing peeps?

 **SlyFox:** bc we have a serious problem!!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** u have a crush on kaleb!!!

 **SlyFox:** lizzie!!

 **Utterly Perfect:** sry she stole her phone back

 **LanLan:** this is perfect! now all we have 2 do is get rafael with some1 and we can go on group d8s!

 **Utterly Perfect:** I am never going on a group d8

 **CandyCaneHigh:** same. And not just bc i cant if hope doesnt but bc this group is 2 chaotic 

**MysteriousMagic:** now that u mention it… when was the last time we all hung out outside this chat

 **ObviousWolf:** idk but were all gonna hang out tmw

 **TopDog:** whats tmw?

 **LanLan:** karaoke! u wanna come?

 **The Enchantress:** wait… I dont have a so so y is ralf the only 1 that has 2 find some1?

 **Utterly Perfect:** nothing! he just u kno forgot that u dont have any1 and stuff for reasons…

 **MysteriousMagic:** hope! How many people did u tell!?

 **The Enchantress:** tell what?

 **SlyFox:** guys! gay panicking over here!!

**_CandyCaneHigh has renamed the chat ‘Gay Panic #2’_ **

**LanLan:** throwback thursday!

 **TopDog:** and it actually is thursday good job babe

 **SlyFox:** GGGGUUUYYYYSSSS!!!!!!

 **Utterly Perfect:** sing him a song tmw

 **MysteriousMagic:** dont force the poor man

 **SlyFox:** sing him a song?? nah thats way 2 emotional

 **CandyCaneHigh:** urg boys

 **Utterly Perfect:** says the girl who 1st told me she loves over a text

 **ObviousWolf:** i remember that

 **SlyFox:** stop getting distracted!!!

 **LanLan:** ok ok so wat can we do

 **Matchmaker:** just tell him how u feel 

**SlyFox:** wat if he doesnt like me back!!!

 **Utterly Perfect:** sometimes u have 2 take a risk for love

 **MysteriousMagic:** that was very poetic

 **SlyFox:** o fuck have 2 add kaleb back

**_SlyFox has deleted 34 messages from the chat_ **

**_SlyFox has added GodOfSchemes to the chat_ **

**GodOfSchemes:** wtf man!?

 **GodOfSchemes:** wat happened to the chat name?

 **GodOfSchemes:** yd u remove me??

 **GodOfSchemes:** wat were u hoes even talkin bout!?!?

 **Utterly Perfect:** uhh...

 **CandyCaneHigh:** boys

 **MysteriousMagic:** girls

 **LanLan:** straights

 **ObviousWolf:** gays

 **TopDog:** um…

 **Matchmaker:** jfc

 **GodOfSchemes:** … 

**GodOfSchemes:** whatever ive gtg

 **SlyFox:** hehe bye!

_20:31_

**_MysteriousMagic has created a chat_ **

**_MysteriousMagic has added Matchmaker, CandyCaneHigh, SlyFox, GodOfSchemes and LanLan to the chat_ **

**_MysteriousMagic has renamed the chat ‘Shipping Crew’_ **

**GodOfSchemes:** another 1

 **SlyFox:** y peez??

 **MysteriousMagic:** i have chosen this small group of people as the shipper crew

MysteriousMagic: these r the people who will 

**MysteriousMagic:** 1\. help match make our friends

 **MysteriousMagic:** 2\. help out our friends if theyre having relationship problems

 **MysteriousMagic:** and 3. make sure our friends in relationships r happy

 **CandyCaneHigh:** u h8 me tho??

 **MysteriousMagic:** that may b so but u r noisy u can keep us updated

 **CandyCaneHigh:** …

 **CandyCaneHigh:** fair

 **LanLan:** y only us?

 **MysteriousMagic:** I have studied ur actions and reactions when it comes 2 relationships and u r the best people 4 the job

 **Matchmaker:** im the only always telling u guys 2 leave them alone??

 **MysteriousMagic** : u shall keeps us in line

 **LanLan:** sry when have I ever cared abt others relationships?

 **MysteriousMagic:** maybe u havent but u can lurk and still care abt it

 **GodOfSchemes:** im sry wat

 **MysteriousMagic:** idk 

**SlyFox:** wat if 1 of us is having relationship trouble?

 **MysteriousMagic:** then we kick them out of the group til its resolved

 **MysteriousMagic:** so

**_MysteriousMagic has removed SlyFox and GodOfSchemes from the chat_ **

**CandyCaneHigh:** o hell yea

 **Matchmaker:** makes sense

 **MysteriousMagic:** let us begin

_21:55_

**_private chat between CandyCaneHigh and MysteriousMagic_ **

**CandyCaneHigh:** its been a while but ive got an update

 **MysteriousMagic:** finally

 **CandyCaneHigh:** ok so josie wont talk much abt it but she did say that the creep was still bothering her

 **CandyCaneHigh:** she only replies every once and a while 2 tell them 2 stop

 **CandyCaneHigh:** when i asked y she hadnt blocked him she said she couldnt she tried but it wouldnt work

 **MysteriousMagic:** so hes some kind of hacker??

 **CandyCaneHigh:** and if he could stop josie from blocking him…

 **MysteriousMagic:** he could prolly find out where she lives… fuck!

 **MysteriousMagic:** im coming over!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** its 10pm

 **MysteriousMagic:** if josies in danger im not just going 2 sit around!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** shes not in danger mom and dad r rite across the hall and we share a room

 **MysteriousMagic:** …

 **CandyCaneHigh:** I promise 2 call u if anything happens ok satan

 **MysteriousMagic:** ok fine! just make sure nothing happens 2 her

 **CandyCaneHigh:** urg just tell her how u feel already this is getting old

 **MysteriousMagic:** yea yea im working on it

Friday

_07:09_

_**group chat ‘Gay Panic #2’** _

**GodOfSchemes:** karaoke day baby!!

 **Matchmaker:** idk wat but something is going 2 go wrong tdy

 **Utterly Perfect:** something always does

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning, you are about to enter my long ass rant about the midseason finale, if you have not seen it yet, DO. NOT. READ. 
> 
> First of all I would like to say Hope could end up with about literally anyone and I would be happy. Josie and Landon were cute but Handon will always be my favourite (straight) ship of legacies. Poor Josie though, she deserves the world but she's really gotten the short end of the stick lately, why can't Penelope come back and be with Josie! Also Lizzie and Sebastian's story in this episode was hot! And Rafael found his father!! I'm so happy for him! I really hope this guys the real deal, you never know who's going to stab you in the back but I love their relationship already. Back to Hope again, is it wrong that a kind of ship her with Clarke?? I feel really bad about it but I do, just a bit. Speaking of Clarke... I know he was going to die anyway but why, I love Clarke, yes I know he's the bad guy of this fanfic but as I've said before I actually really like his character. I just needed a villain. The necromancer is back! he was the one that killed Clarke, yes, but he's also one of my favourite monsters so I'm glad. Malivore is closed, though Julie Plec has said that Malivore will be the big bad of the entire series so I wonder how long until it reappears. I can't believe I have to wait until next year for the next episode. I hate waiting. 
> 
> Anyway, hope you liked the chapter, and unlike the show I won't be taking a break so look forward to more in the near future.


	16. I’m sorry I didn’t say it before

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **CandyCaneHigh:** hobbit. bf of hobbit. wolf boi. where da fuck r yaa
> 
>  **SlyFox:** dont mind her shes a lil drunkie
> 
>  **GodOfSchemes:** so r u mg
> 
>  **Matchmaker:** srsly tho guys where r u?
> 
>  **LanLan:** sry we got a little hold up
> 
>  **ObviousWolf:** wat he means is i found him and jed making out IN MY MOMS BED
> 
> OR
> 
> Karaoke night is finally here, Penelope's prediction might be coming true and there's some drama between our favourite will they/won't they couple.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit all over the place so sorry in advance.

_15:29_

_**group chat ‘Gay Panic #2’** _

**MysteriousMagic:** i expect every1 at my house by 6

 **GodOfSchemes:** eXpeCT

 **SlyFox:** “expect” lol

**CandyCaneHigh:** will u not let us in past 6 or something satan?

**MysteriousMagic:** well i wont b letting u in at all

 **Matchmaker:** could u 2 go 1 day without arguing

 **Utterly Perfect:** they cant ur sister literally texted me in the middle of a test ysd 2 tell me how annoying penelope was bc she sat in front of her???

 **Utterly Perfect:** [lizziesrant.jpg]

 **CandyCaneHigh:** im leaving u!

 **LanLan:** uh can u even go a day without seeing each other???

 **SlyFox:** nope they cant

 **Utterly Perfect:** i h8 all of u

 **LanLan:** nah u luv us

 **ObviousWolf:** yea u love us 2 much 2 h8 us!!!

 **MysteriousMagic:** u wanna fuck all of us!

 **Matchmaker:** ANYWAY

 **TopDog:** wat is happening??

 **CandyCaneHigh:** welcome 2 hell

 **MysteriousMagic:** so my house. karaoke. dont b late 

**GodOfSchemes:** cant wait!

 **MysteriousMagic:** prepare urself lizzie!! ur gonna get wet hearin ur gurl siiiing

 **Utterly Perfect:** do u ever shut up!

_18:38_

**CandyCaneHigh:** hobbit. bf of hobbit. wolf boi. where da fuck r yaa

 **SlyFox:** dont mind her shes a lil drunkie

 **GodOfSchemes:** so r u mg

 **Matchmaker:** srsly tho guys where r u?

 **LanLan:** sry we got a little hold up

 **ObviousWolf:** wat he means is i found him and jed making out IN MY MOMS BED

 **SlyFox:** dvnfvnmcvnrfjncv HAHAHA

 **LanLan:** we said we were sorry!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** we bout 2 statr singin beaches so hury p

 **GodOfSchemes:** beaches????

 **Matchmaker:** “beaches”

 **LanLan:** “beaches” lmao

 **SlyFox:** get ur cute asses ovr hear!!!

 **GodOfSchemes:** hurry up

 **TopDog:** sry guys we’re almost there

_18:53_

**Matchmaker:** fuck hope rly is a good singer…

 **GodOfSchemes:** good? shes fuckin amazing! im getting hard

 **MysteriousMagic:** told yall

 **SlyFox:** yall lol

 **LanLan:** do u c the look on lizzies face? Looks like she could orgasm just from hearing her voice…

 **MysteriousMagic:** do u guys not take me seriously?

 **TopDog:** her voice is gorgeous tbh

 **TopDog:** and im saying this as a gay man

 **ObviousWolf:** her voice is making me think i mite not b ace…

 **Matchmaker:** rite!

 **GodOfSchemes:** is she… crying?

 **MysteriousMagic:** well duh i picked out the song!

 **Lanlan:** it is very emotional…

_18:56_

**SlyFox:** LMFAO!!!!!!

 **LanLan:** THEY FUCKING LEFT!!!!!!!!

 **MysteriousMagic:** I WASNT BEING SERIOUS WEN I SAID SHED WANNA FUCK HER!!!

 **MysteriousMagic:** OK SO I WAS BUT STILL!

 **Matchmaker:** guys! Stop yelling!

 **TopDog:** I cant believe lizzie actually dragged her off tho… wasnt expecting that

 **ObviousWolf:** y r u guys texting? We r literally rite next 2 each other???

 **GodOfSchemes:** yea hoes! its my turn so ya better listen!

_19:37_

**SlyFox:** so uh…

 **TopDog:** that was…

 **LanLan:** yea…

 **GodOfSchemes:** yd josie run away tho?

 **ObviousWolf:** she finally had the girl of her dreams singin 2 her and she just… left?

 **Utterly Perfect:** wait josie left??

 **CandyCaneHigh:** if that she devil made my sister cry ill kill her!

 **LanLan:** we dont kno wat happened

 **SlyFox:** peez was singing this super romantic song 2 josie

 **GodOfSchemes:** which like finally!

 **SlyFox:** then josie jst… ran out??

 **LanLan:** then penelope followed her and here we r

 **Utterly Perfect:** shit…

 **CandyCaneHigh:** she just ran out of the room…

 **GodOfSchemes:** sry did we interrupt ur fucking?

 **CandyCaneHigh:** we werent doing anything u pervs!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** 1st of were still here just upstairs

 **CandyCaneHigh:** and we were literally just talking!!

 **TopDog:** about…

 **CandyCaneHigh:** NONE OF UR BUSINESS

 **SlyFox:** ok jeez gurl

 **LanLan:** this has been 1 hell of a nite

_19:41_

**_private chat between MysteriousMagic and Utterly Perfect_ **

**Utterly Perfect:** peny u ok?

 **Utterly Perfect:** ur prolly w/ josie and cant talk but text me when u can

 **Utterly Perfect:** im worried

_20:04_

**MysteriousMagic:** um have u uh already left?

 **Utterly Perfect:** no

 **Utterly Perfect:** every1 else already went home but im still here

 **MysteriousMagic:** can u stay where u r? im coming home now

 **Utterly Perfect:** ofc b wat happened P

 **MysteriousMagic:** well the love of my life just told me she never wants to see my face again

 **Utterly Perfect:** penny…

_21:50_

**_private chat between CandyCaneHigh and Utterly Perfect_ **

**Utterly perfect:** I love you

 **CandyCaneHigh:** wait what!?

 **Utterly Perfect:** I’m sorry I didn’t say it before

 **CandyCaneHigh:** is this like payback 4 1st saying ily over text bc i apologized like 10 times

 **Utterly Perfect:** lol no! But i cant leave penelope and i needed u 2 kno that ilysm

 **CandyCaneHigh:** josie told me wat happened…

 **Utterly Perfect:** ik u h8 penelope liz…

 **CandyCaneHigh:** I do

 **CandyCaneHigh:** but i also know she loves my sister. she sucks at showing it. but she does love her…

 **Utterly Perfect:** so what r we going 2 do?

 **CandyCaneHigh:** we handle this 1 on our own bc i can not deal with those annoyances getting in the way

 **Utterly Perfect:** ok yea… but whats our plan?

 **CandyCaneHigh:** …

 **CandyCaneHigh:** meet u in the park tmw at noon? we can plan then

 **Utterly Perfect:** ok sure

 **CandyCaneHigh:** and hope…

 **Utterly Perfect:** yea?

 **CandyCaneHigh:** ily 2. always have

 **Utterly Perfect:** night lizzie

 **CandyCaneHigh:** night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't even know if this chapter is good or not but I had a lot of fun writing it. A lot of shit went down but that just means we're getting closer to the good part.


	17. #proud

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **SlyFox:** have u figured something out??
> 
>  **CandyCaneHigh:** nope but ur gonna help us
> 
>  **SlyFox:** im gonna help myself u mean
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** potato potahto
> 
>  **CandyCaneHigh:** either way u get a hot bf
> 
>  **SlyFox:** jeez
> 
> OR
> 
> Penelope and Josie finally stop beating around the bush, the "Shipping Crew" continue trying to help MG and Hope creates divine art

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did this whole chapter on my phone while visiting my grandparents, so just a warning there might be even more mistakes then usual

Sunday

_11:12_

**_group chat 'Gay Panic #2'_ **

**GodOfSchemes:** so... we ever gonna talk about wat went down on friday??

 **ObviousWolf:** u wanna b the 1 2 confront penelope?

 **SlyFox:** ya hes gotta point

 **CandyCaneHigh:** what do u idiots not understand abt a gc

 **TopDog:** maybe there not online???

 **LanLan:** hopeful thinking babe

 **GodOfSchemes:** well do u kno wats happening

 **CandyCaneHigh:** none of Ur business

 **SlyFox:** so u do kno

 **Utterly Perfect:** guys shut up. trying 2 focus here

 **LanLan:** on wat?

 **Utterly Perfect:** painting and my muse keeps moving!!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** ok ok jeez

 **CandyCaneHigh:** shut up guys im getting painted

 **TopDog:** so they totally kno something

 **SlyFox:** yep thats wat we got from that

 **GodOfSchemes:** welp we gonna try and find out or wat?

 **LanLan:** is that a good idea

 **SlyFox:** is anything we do a good idea?

 **LanLan:** fair point

 **ObviousWolf:** yea thats tru

 **Matchmaker:** if u guys r going 2 snoop do u have 2 suck at it?

 **MysteriousMagic:** smh i expected better from u guys

 **GodOfSchemes:** eh look whos back

 **Matchmaker:** we never left

 **CandyCaneHigh:** ty 4 finally talking! i was fucking dying over here!

 **Utterly Perfect:** LIZZIE!!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** jc hope

 **CandyCaneHigh:** fbfnkrkxnrj

 **SlyFox:** uhh

 **Utterly Perfect:** sry i took her phone continue without us

 **ObviousWolf:** lmao

 **GodOfSchemes:** ok now tell us wats goin on

 **MyteriousMagic:** after many hour of aruging

 **Matchmaker:** 1 argument that lasted like 10 mins she means

 **MysteriousMagic:** and some scheming bitches w/ guts who tricked us

 **Matchmaker:** Lizzie and hope btw

 **LanLan:** yep sounds about rite

 **MysteriousMagic:** we have joined together as 1

 **Matchmaker:** ffs penny! were together! she means were together!

 **GodOfSchemes:** FUCKING FINALLY!!!!!!

 **LanLan:** TIME TO PARTY BTICHES

 **SlyFox:** my children!! ive been waiting for this day 4ever!!!

 **ObviousWolf:** gotta say its about time

 **TopDog:** um congrats u guys

 **Utterly Perfect:** hope went 2 the bathroom so i stole her phone - lizzie

 **Utterly Perfect:** anyway tell them our genius plan

 **MysteriousMagic:** u trapped us in the park

 **Utterly Perfect:** u coulda left

 **Matchmaker:** no we couldnt! u 2 wouldnt let us!

 **Utterly Perfect:** thats obviously a lie

 **SlyFox:** lol

 **GodOfSchemes:** "obviously"

 **MysteriousMagic:** anyways we talked it out and here we r

 **Utterly Perfect:** ur welcome

 **TopDog:** u guys r rly something

 **LanLan:** arent we tho

_11:27_

**Utterly Perfect:** im changing my passcode

_19:44_

_**group chat 'Shipping Crew'** _

**CandyCaneHigh:** so since my amazing plan of getting the 2 morons 2gether worked... y dont we just do it for the other pair of morons??

 **Matchmaker:** 1st of all rude

 **Matchmaker:** and 2nd of all the same plan never works twice

 **LanLan:** shes got a point and if we take them 2 the park theyll be suspicious

 **MysteriousMagic:** nice try tho elizabeth

 **CandyCaneHigh:** fine then! any1 else have an idea??

 **LanLan:** how bout we add mg back? he probably already knows wat were up 2 and it is him were trying 2 help??

 **Matchmaker:** yea that could work

**_MysteriousMagic has added SlyFox to the chat_ **

**SlyFox:** have u figured something out??

 **CandyCaneHigh:** nope but ur gonna help us

 **SlyFox:** im gonna help myself u mean

 **MysteriousMagic:** potato potahto

 **CandyCaneHigh:** either way u get a hot bf

 **SlyFox:** jeez

_20:31_

_**group chat 'Gay Panic #2'** _

**_CandyCaneHigh has changed Utterly Perfect's name to 'DivineArt'_ **

**CandyCaneHigh:**

**DivineArt:** y do u do this

 **CandyCaneHigh:** cuz i wanna show evey1 how talented my gf is duh 

**CandyCaneHigh:** also i had 2 stand in the woods 4 the whole day so...

 **MysteriousMagic:** u dont look half bad here dude hope rly is a miracal worker

 **TopDog:** did that take all day??

 **DivineArt:** yep just finished up

 **LanLan:** #proud

 **ObviousWolf:** howd u learn 2 paint like that hope?

 **DivineArt:** well my dad was a painter and he started teaching me b4 i could talk

 **MysteriousMagic:** im proud 2 call u my ex fuck buddy

 **DivineArt:** u kno u could just say best friend

 **TopDog:** wait wat??

 **LanLan:** dont get her started

 **MysteriousMagic:** relax losers im in a happy relationship w/ the love of meh life

 **CandyCaneHigh:** uve been d8ing 4 like 5 mins

 **ObviousWolf:** were is Josie anyway?

 **CandyCaneHigh:** idk im not home remember

 **TopDog:** i saw her w/ mg abt 20 mins ago

 **DivineArt:** where?

 **TopDog:** they walked past the grill while i was working

 **MysteriousMagic:** U WERE AT THE GRILL

 **LanLan:** FUCKING LUCKY!!!

 **TopDog:** am i missing something here?

 **CandyCaneHigh:** these idiots got themselves banned 4 a month

 **DivineArt:** that was abt 2 weeks ago i think

 **ObviousWolf:** 12 days actually

 **CandyCaneHigh:** lol u counted the days!

 **ObviousWolf:** shut up!

_20:55_

**SlyFox:** so… we have news…

 **Matchmaker:** very unexpected news…

 **MysteriousMagic:** oo sounds juicy! do tell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I was originally going to post one more chapter before this one, mostly of hizzie planning and such, but I decided to say stuff it and just have them already together. I'll eventually write them actually getting together as part of the series, but there's a lot of others I have to write first so it might take a while. Just a heads up.
> 
> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = SlyFox  
> Lizzie Saltzman = CandyCaneHigh  
> Kaleb Hawkins = GodOfSchemes  
> Penelope Park = MysteriousMagic  
> Josie Salzman = Matchmaker  
> Hope Mikaelson = DivineArt  
> Landon Kirby = LanLan  
> Rafael Waithe = ObviousWolf  
> Jed = TopDog


	18. more like wat did i say back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **MysteriousMagic:** stfu!
> 
>  **SlyFox:** lets get back to getting me laid!
> 
>  **CandyCaneHigh:** urg now im picturing in my head
> 
>  **Matchmaker:** thanks lizzie! now we all r
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** ill give u something else 2 think abt jojo ;)
> 
>  **CandyCaneHigh:** pls no
> 
> OR
> 
> The gang spoils season 4 of Lucifer for Jed, the Shipping Crew comes up with a plan and Lizzie might have put an end to Josie's creepy stalker

Monday

_16:06_

_**group chat ‘Gay Panic #2’** _

**MysteriousMagic:** its been a day and i still cant believe it

 **Matchmaker:** can we not talk about this

 **CandyCaneHigh:** i agree

 **LanLan:** u mean not talk about the fact that ur dad is banging the sheriff

 **DivineArt:** u definitely did that on purpose

 **CandyCaneHigh:** I AM GOING TO FUCKING MURDER U MOPHEAD!!!!!

 **Matchmaker:** im mortified

 **ObviousWolf:** u tryin 2 get urself killed bro

 **TopDog:** that was not a smart move babe

 **LanLan:** gtg in2 hiding bai!

 **MysteriousMagic:** lmfao

 **DivineArt:** she actually is

 **DivineArt:** [pennysbreakdown.mp4]

 **MysteriousMagic:** HOW DARE U MIKAELSON

 **GodOfSchemes:** yo is she ok?

 **Matchmaker:** awe u look so cute P

 **DivineArt:** now shes smiling like an idiot

 **DivineArt:** [smilefest.jpg]

 **SlyFox:** wat r u 2 doing anyway??

 **MysteriousMagic:** rewatching season 4 of lucifer

 **DiveineArt:** bc we like 2 make ourselves sad apparently

 **GodOfSchemes:** season 4 is hella sad

 **TopDog:** i havent had a chance 2 watch the last season yet… 

**Matchmaker:** dont!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** srsly! DO. NOT. WATCH. IT!!

 **TopDog:** ok…

 **LanLan:** there being over dramatic

 **MysteriousMagic:** OVERDRAMATIC!!!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** HOW FUCKING DARE U!!!

 **DivineArt:** wat have u done

 **GodOfSchemes:** ur making a lot of mistakes 2da man

 **SlyFox:** U MEAN 2 TELL ME U WERENT FUCKNG HEARTROKEN WHEN LUCIFER HAD 2 RETURN 2 HELL WHEN HE’D SPENT THE ENTIRE SERIES NOT WANTING 2 GO BACK

 **MysteriousMagic:** AND RITE AFTER HE AND CHLOE CONFESSED THERE LOVE 2!!!

 **ObviousWolf:** hope ur in a good hiding spot lan

 **CandyCaneHigh:** AND U WERE TORN APART BY THE FACT THAT MAZE AND EVE DIDNT END UP TOGETHER!?!? THAT POOR POOR MAZE LOST THE LOVE OF HER LIFE

 **LanLan:** did any1 actually get a happy ending tho…?

 **DivineArt:** uhh…

 **MysteriousMagic:** wait did they??

 **TopDog:** GUYS SHUT UP WAT PART OF HAVENT SEEN IT YET DO U NOT UNDERSTAND

 **Matchmaker:** lol

 **GodOfSchemes:** well linda and amenadiel got charlie back and arent taking him to heaven so… thats 1 thing

 **CandyCaneHigh:** and ella put her necklace back on 

**CandyCaneHigh:** i mean god seems like a dick but like… she has her faith back?

 **SlyFox:** and dan is starting 2 not be a douche anymore

 **ObviousWolf:** well… not as much of a douche

 **DivineArt:** wait… did maze return 2 hell 2??

 **MysteriousMagic:** OMG UR RITE

 **GodOfSchemes:** it was never answered

 **LanLan:** she didnt rly have anywhere else 2 go since eve went off 2 find her self or whatever

 **SlyFox:** also… wat abt the peeps who didnt kno abt lucifer?? he left and they didnt kno?? 

**CandyCaneHigh:** they kinda left out a lot of things didnt they?

 **MysteriousMagic:** Y CANT SEASON 5 GET HERE ALREADY!!!!

 **GodOfSchemes:** hurry up and watch it jed

 **TopDog:** well u guys kinda just spoiled the whole think 4 me so i dont rly have 2 do i??

 **ObviousWolf:** tru

 **Matchmaker:** sorry…

_19:25_

**_group chat ‘Shipping Crew’_ **

**MysteriousMagic:** i need a distraction

 **LanLan:** lol u finish season 4?

 **MysteriousMagic:** stfu!

 **SlyFox:** lets get back to getting me laid!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** urg now im picturing in my head

 **Matchmaker:** thanks lizzie! now we all r

 **MysteriousMagic:** ill give u something else 2 think abt jojo ;)

 **CandyCaneHigh:** pls no

 **SlyFox:** can we get back on topic

 **LanLan:** i got an idea

 **MysteriousMagic:** shoot

 **LanLan:** mg just… asks kaleb out!

 **SlyFox:** wtf dude??

 **Matchmaker:** ur rly trying 2 piss every1 off 2da arent u?

 **LanLan:** i dont mean out on a d8. just hang out like u always do and subtly hint at wanting 2 bone him

 **CandyCaneHigh:** do u rly think that would work hobbit?

 **MysteriousMagic:** its not actually that bad of an idea

 **SlyFox:** rly peez?

 **MysteriousMagic:** u go out on a “not d8” and by the end of the nite ull b making out

 **SlyFox:** we hang out all the time tho whatll b different abt this time?

 **MysteriousMagic:** the difference is this time we’ll b there 2 back u up

 **Matchmaker:** i had a feeling u were gonna say that

 **LanLan:** so were gonna follow them around all nite?

 **MysteriousMagic:** yep and help things along

 **CandyCaneHigh:** i can get behind this

 **SlyFox:** thanks… i think

 **Matchmaker:** o boy

Tuesday

_02:53_

_**private chat between CandyCaneHigh and MysteriousMagic** _

**CandyCaneHigh:** wake up evil 1!

 **MysteriousMagic:** im not asleep

 **CandyCaneHigh:** well good bc ive got news

 **MysteriousMagic:** spill

 **CandyCaneHigh:** so i went downstairs 2 get a drink. josie must have forgot 2 bring her phone 2 bed w/ her cuz i found it on the kitchen counter

 **CandyCaneHigh:** it was blowing up w/ messages so i checked it and it was the creep again

 **MysteriousMagic:** what did the creep say

 **CandyCaneHigh:** more like wat did i say back

 **CandyCaneHigh:** [myresponse.jpg]

 **MysteriousMagic:** woah… not bad

 **MysteriousMagic:** ur bitchiness came in handy 4 once

 **CandyCaneHigh:** dont go getting soft on me park

 **MysteriousMagic:** wouldnt dream of it

 **CandyCaneHigh:** anyway he didnt answer so i think i scared him off

 **CandyCaneHigh:** 4 now anyways

 **MysteriousMagic:** cool text me if it starts up again but our work might b done here

 **CandyCaneHigh:** yep thank god

 **MysteriousMagic:** gn drama queen

 **CandyCaneHigh:** nite satan

 **MysteriousMagic:** lucifer*


	19. quality over quantity satan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **TopDog:** still cant believe u got urselves banned tho
> 
>  **SlyFox:** it was all peez fault
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** excuse you!?! it was not
> 
>  **Matchmaker:** baby... u put alcohol in our drinks without telling us
> 
>  **DivineArt:** definitely something penelope would do
> 
>  **MysteriousMagic:** whatever!
> 
>  **LanLan:** lmao
> 
> OR
> 
> the gang is back after two weeks of silence, Penelope and Lizzie get into a fight (shocker) and MG's "not date" with Kaleb is planned  
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long, I hit a wall and even after two weeks this turned out to be one of the shorter chapters. Legacies is coming back on the 16th so hopefully a new episode will give me inspiration. I'll try to get another chapter out before then but no promises. enjoy!

Tuesday

_18:32_

**_group chat 'Gay Panic #2'_ **

**GodOfSchemes:** yo this chat has been dead 4 like 2 weeks

 **CandyCaneHigh:** uh yea cuz we have lives outside our phones

 **LanLan:** mm sounds fake

 **MysteriousMagic:** ive just been annoying hope

 **DivineArt:** 2\. weeks. straight u guys

 **SlyFox:** u mean 2 weeks gay

 **ObviousWolf:** u 2 r flying back 2da rite?

 **MysteriousMagic:** yep hopes family is all like "u cant miss 2 much school girls"

 **Matchmaker:** y were u staying w/ hope 4 the holidays again??

 **DivineArt:** bc her mom had 2 work

 **TopDog:** on christmas? thats harsh

 **GodOfSchemes:** anyways. im bored gimme something 2 do u guys

 **SlyFox:** u can come over 2 my place and play video games

 **GodOfSchemes:** dope b rite over

_18:38_

**_group chat 'Shipping Crew'_ **

**LanLan:** go mg!

 **SlyFox:** shut up nothings going 2 happen 2nite

 **MysteriousMagic:** thats wat they all say

_18:39_

**_group chat 'Gay Panic #2'_ **

**LanLan:** guys! our month ban at the grill ends tmw

 **Matchmaker:** finally

 **GodOfSchemes:** i was never banned so...

 **CandyCaneHigh:** dont kno wat all the fuss is abt

 **ObviousWolf:** u dont have 2 rub it in

 **TopDog:** still cant believe u got urselves banned tho

 **SlyFox:** it was all peez fault

 **MysteriousMagic:** excuse you!?! it was not

 **Matchmaker:** baby... u put alcohol in our drinks without telling us

 **DivineArt:** definitely something penelope would do

 **MysteriousMagic:** whatever!

 **LanLan:** lmao

Wednesday

_02:44_

**CandyCaneHigh:** my brain officially hates me!

 **Matchmaker:** she cant sleep so she woke me up now shes seeing if any of u guys r up

 **DivineArt:** we just landed so

 **MysteriousMagic:** guys! hope has her own private jet

 **DivineArt:** 4 the last time its my aunt rebekahs not mine

 **LanLan:** its so cool isnt it!

 **CandyCaneHigh:** back 2 more important things. namely... me

 **MysteriousMagic:** no... i dont think so

 **CandyCaneHigh:** no1 cares wat u think evil 1!

 **MysteriousMagic:** on the contrary. every1 cares

 **Matchmaker:** i swear 2 god

 **DivineArt:** y. just y

 **LanLan:** i feel sry 4 u guys

 **Lanlan:** ur always in the middle of there fighting lol

 **Matchmaker:** ikr

 **DivineArt:** tell me abt it

 **MysteriousMagic:** she started it

 **CandyCaneHigh:** she started it

 **MysteriousMagic:** ha i typed it quicker then u

 **CandyCaneHigh:** quality over quantity satan

 **DivineArt:** 4 the love of... 

**Matchmaker:** srsly u guys? cut it out

 **LanLan:** this is hilarious

 **CandyCaneHigh:** o shut it hobbit

 **GodOfSchemes:** WOULD YALL SHUT UP IM TRYING 2 SLEEP!!!!!

 **Matchmaker:**...

 **CandyCaneHigh:**...

 **MysteriousMagic:**...

 **LanLan:**...

 **DivineArt:** so... nite u guys

 **MysteriousMagic:** aha

 **CandyCaneHigh:** yep

 **LanLan:** gn

 **Matchmaker:** cya at school

 **GodOfschemes:** ty!

_05:20_

_**group chat 'Shipping Crew'** _

**MysteriousMagic:** now that im back we're gonna put our plan in2 action this afternoon

 **SlyFox:** so soon?

 **CandyCaneHigh:** do u want a bf or not?

 **SlyFox:** i just thought id have a while 2 u kno… prepare

 **LanLan:** we came up w/ this plan weeks ago mg...

 **Matchmaker:** sometimes you've got to take a leap of faith

 **MysteriousMagic:** c full words and everything

 **SlyFox:**...

 **SlyFox:** ok fine! so how r u guys going 2 help exactly

 **MysteriousMagic:** y i never thought ud ask

 **MysteriousMagic:** u'll ask kaleb 2 hang out after school but wat he doesnt kno is that we'll b tailing u

 **MysteriousMagic:** just do the things u normally do when u hang out and we'll b there 2 put a romantic spin on the whole thing

 **SlyFox:** how?

 **MysteriousMagic:** dont u worry abt that

 **CandyCaneHigh:** and if all goes according 2 plan by the end of the nite ull have a bf

 **LanLan:** and have a little fun along the way

 **Matchmaker:** u dont have 2 worry abt anything apart from having fun mg

 **SlyFox:** thanks. u guys r the best

 **CandyCaneHigh:** we know

 **MysteriousMagic:** we kno

 **LanLan:** o i know

 **SlyFox:**...

 **Matchmaker:** so modest smh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = SlyFox  
> Lizzie Saltzman = CandyCaneHigh  
> Kaleb Hawkins = GodOfSchemes  
> Penelope Park = MysteriousMagic  
> Josie Salzman = Matchmaker  
> Hope Mikaelson = DivineArt  
> Landon Kirby = LanLan  
> Rafael Waithe = ObviousWolf  
> Jed = TopDog


	20. and im turning my phone off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **DivineArt:** so? what happened??
> 
>  **DragonMaster:** u just interrupted a moment _hope_
> 
>  **DivineArt:** sorry not sorry
> 
>  **DivineArt:** now spill!
> 
>  **DragonMaster:** im rolling my eyes right now btw
> 
> OR
> 
> Someone makes an accidental confession, Hope and Landon annoy each other and Josie gets traumatized

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is kind of an apology chapter because the next chapter of 'He was so screwed' was supposed to be up by tomorrow, but I forgot to back it up and now I have to start all over again, so I wrote this instead. Like, in an hour so, it might suck.

Thursday

_15:46_

**_group chat 'Gay Panic #2'_ **

**_CandyCaneHigh has changed their name to 'BiMess'_ **

**BiMess:** since its no longer christmas i thought i should change my username

 **LanLan:** i just realized that rafael and penelope have only changed their usernames once

 **LanLan:** and jed 2 but he hasnt been here as long

_**MysteriousMagic has changed their name to 'hot &feisty'** _

**hot &feisty: **now i have

_**GodOfSchemes has change ObviousWolf's name to 'AceHeart'** _

**GodOfschemes:** now ralf has 2

 **AceHeart:** not bad tbh

_**LanLan has changed their name to 'DragonMaster'** _

**DragonMaster:** i felt like joining the fun

 **SlyFox:** dragon master???

 **DragonMaster:** uhuh. i had a dream once and i slayed a dragon!

 **DragonMaster:**...well ok hope slayed the dragon but... im keeping the name!

 **DragonMaster:** also... lizzie and josies dad was there for some reason... ralf 2

 **Matchmaker:** u have some rly weird dreams

 **DivineArt:** y did i slay the dragon??

 **hot &feisty: **i can c it

 **TopDog:** so... should i change my name or...?

 **AceHeart:** idefk anymore

 **BiMess:** hope says ur all insane

 **DivineArt:** LIZZIE

 **SlyFox:** lol #calledout

 **GodOfSchemes:** i thought u appreciated us hope

 **DragonMaster:** just rip out our heart y dont ya

 **hot &feisty: **i dont think ill ever recover from that blow

 **Matchmaker:** drama queens

 **TopDog:** y r u guys like this?

 **DivineArt:** im never talking 2 any of u again

 **Bimess** **:** u can try lmao

 **DivineArt:** i hate u

 **BiMess:** i love u

 **GodOfSchemes:** i hate that i love u!!

 **AceHeart:** o no

 **TopDog:** wat??

 **hot &feisty: ** Don't want to, but I can't put

 **SlyFox:** Nobody else above you

 **DivineArt:** ftlg no!!

 **TopDog:** wat is happening??

 **DragonMaster:** its a mf sing-a-long!!!

 **Matchmaker:** I hate you I love you

 **BiMess:** hope h8s it

 **BiMess:** I hate that I want you

 **DivineArt:** so u do it 2 annoy me

 **hot &feisty: **pretty much yea

 **AceHeart:** o well cant do anything abt it now

 **GodOfSchemes:** u joined in last time dude

 **AceHeart:** tru

 **AceHeart:** You want her, you need her

 **TopDog:** And I'll never be her

 **SlyFox:** ehhh

 **DragonMaster:** just when i thought i couldnt love u more

 **TopDog:** dsngvienvopdfnf

 **BiMess:** omfg

 **Matchmaker:** was that...

 **hot &feisty: **bloody hell

_16:00_

**_private chat between DivineArt and DragonMaster_ **

**DragonMaster:** AHHHHGGHGHGHGHHHHHHHHHHHJHHJHG

 **DivineArt:** dude did u srsly just tell jed u love him 4 the 1st time over text???

 **DragonMaster:** SHUT IP U SAID THATS HWO IT HAPENED W/ U AND LIZIE!!!!!!!!

 **DivineArt:** tru... but at least it wasnt an accident

 **DragonMaster:** BITCH HELP MEEEEEE

 **DragonMaster:** FUCK HES TETING MEEEE

 **DivineArt:** then answer him!

 **DragonMaster:** ew hope thats a terrible idea!!!

 **DivineArt:** at least ur not texting in all caps anymore

 **DragonMaster:** srsly hope WTF DO I DO

 **DivineArt:** ANSWER. HIM.

 **DragonMaster:** but hooope

 **DivineArt:** ffs landon answer him or i swear-

 **DragonMaster:** alrite! alrite!

_16:04_

**_private chat between DragonMaster and TopDog_ **

**TopDog:** um so... did u mean wat u said??

 **TopDog:** bc i wanna answer but um... i want 2 make sure u meant it 1st

 **DragonMaster:** uh yea i uh... yea i meant it

 **TopDog:** well in that case I love you to Landon

 **DragonMaster:** wait really?!?!

 **TopDog:** I know it hasn't been all that long but yeah, I love you. I think I have for a while now

 **DragonMaster:** full sentences and everything.

 **DragonMaster:** oh hang on 1 second hopes being a noisy little shit

_16:06_

**_private chat between DivineArt and DragonMaster_ **

**DivineArt:** so? what happened??

 **DragonMaster:** u just interrupted a moment _hope_

 **DivineArt:** sorry not sorry

 **DivineArt:** now spill!

 **DragonMaster:** im rolling my eyes right now btw

 **DragonMaster:** [whatyouinterrupted.jpg]

 **DivineArt:** says the pot 2 the kettle

 **DivineArt:** ur always asking abt lizzie asshole

 **DivineArt:** but also im happy 4 u

 **DragonMaster:** thx and as much as ily can i get back 2 my bf now???

 **DivineArt:** sure but call me later

 **DragonMaster:** will do

_16:09_

**_private chat between DragonMaster and TopDog_ **

**DragonMaster:** sorry

 **TopDog:** its fine xd

 **TopDog:** do u wanna come over talk more in person

 **DragonMaster:** yea yea id love 2

 **DragonMaster:** im on my way over now

 **DragonMaster:** and im turning my phone off

 **TopDog:** good call i will 2 cya in a bit

  
_16:27_

**_group chat 'Gay Panic #2'_ **

_**SlyFox has changed the chat name to** _ **'** **_Rule No.2. Answer Your Fucking Phone'_ **

**SlyFox:** srsly ive called them both abt 10 times

 **DivineArt:** Give them there space

 **BiMess:** says u

 **DivineArt:** Stop reading over my should-Hope you're going to get us killed!

 **Matchmaker:**???

 **DivineArt:** Sorry I have voice-text on, I'm taking Lizzie home

 **BiMess:** shes a horrible drive

 **DivineArt:** Fuck you

 **DivineArt:** Again? Who knew you had so much stamina

 **DivineArt:** Shut up!

 **GodOfSchemes:** tmi!!

 **BiMess:** she turned it off

 **Matchmaker:** i-i uh fuck

 **hot &feisty: **poor baby

 **AceHeart:** u alrite jo?

 **GodOfSchemes:** yo josie!?

 **BiMess:** fuck i broke my sister!!

 **SlyFox:** josie.exe has stopped responding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = SlyFox  
> Lizzie Saltzman = BiMess  
> Kaleb Hawkins = GodOfSchemes  
> Penelope Park = hot&feisty  
> Josie Salzman = Matchmaker  
> Hope Mikaelson = DivineArt  
> Landon Kirby = DragonMaster  
> Rafael Waithe = AceHeart  
> Jed = TopDog


	21. i think u broke him...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **DragonMaster:** also hope just sat down w/ the twins and i and was like "josie y r u blushing so hard??"
> 
>  **Matchmaker:** shut up landon! 
> 
> **Matchmaker:** shes also wonder y were all on our phones can we focus on that please!?
> 
>  **hot &feisty: **awe jojo ur so adorable! where r u I wanna come kiss u 4 being the most adorable thing in the universe
> 
>  **BiMess:** no u will stay as far away from us as possible! i already feel the need 2 throw up!
> 
>  **SlyFox:** guuuuyss! stop getting distracted!
> 
> OR
> 
> Kaleb's plan for taking down Connor is revealed, the "Shipping Crew" take the first step for MG's "not date" and another member is added

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a few more days until the return of legacies, I'm so excited!! This is probably the last chapter till then so enjoy, and I'll see you after S02 E09 "I couldn't have done this without you"

Friday

_10:24_

**_group chat ' Rule No.2. Answer Your Fucking Phone'_ **

**SlyFox:** in just realized we have yet 2 plan how we take connor down!

_10:27_

**Matchmaker:** and u realized this in the middle of geo how exactly??

 **SlyFox:** connors sitting in front of me being annoying and i thought "cant wait 2 take this guy down"

 **SlyFox:** then it hit me that we havent planned his demise yet...

 **AceHeart:** maybe we could i dont kno… plan this after class!

_10:42_

**GodOfSchemes:** u lot may not have but i certainly have

 **GodOfSchemes:** u c while u hoes were playin around and shit

 **GodOfSchemes:** I came up w/ the perfect plan 2 take connor (and dana as well) down

_10:56_

**DragonMaster:** explain quickly b4 the next bell

 **GodOfSchemes:** ok so our raid last month was extremely helpful

 **GodOfSchemes:** its simple rly: if connor steps out of line we threaten 2 tell the school all his dirt little secrets

 **SlyFox:** thats it??

 **GodOfSchemes:** well yea u uh... u dont like it??

 **SlyFox:** no i do! ur plans r just usually a bit more complicated than that thats all

 **GodOfSchemes:** well unlike u these idiots wouldnt b able 2 keep up w/ my brilliance

 **TopDog:** u kno were rite here!?

 **DragonMaster:** yea stop flirting and get 2 class

 **SlyFox:** were not flirting and im already here!

 **GodOfSchemes:** we were kinda flirting and i have a free period

 **SlyFox:** fndkgjnxxlxfngm

 **TopDog:** i think u broke him...

 **DragonMaster:** u definitely broke him and get 2 study hall

 **GodOfSchemes:** since when r u captain responsible??

 **DragonMaster:** i dont want u 2 get detention 2da

 **GodOfSchemes:** y???

 **DragonMaster:**...no reason

_13:07_

**_group chat 'Shipping Crew'_ **

**BiMess:** wtaf hobbit!?!?

 **BiMess:** u couldve blown the whole operation

 **hot &feisty: **"we were kinda flirting"!!!!!

 **Matchmaker:** maybe u dont need our help after all

 **SlyFox:** kaleb flirts w/ everything that moves it means nothing!

 **hot &feisty: **i used 2 b like that

 **hot &feisty:** but then i met jojo and she became the only 1 that mattered

 **BiMess:** u should c how hard shes blushing

 **BiMess:** [blushingbrunette.jpg]

 **BiMess:** excuse me while i go baff

 **DragonMaster:** well i think its adorable!

 **DragonMaster:** and i also think that 2nite is going 2 go great

 **DragonMaster:** also hope just sat down w/ the twins and i and was like "josie y r u blushing so hard??"

 **Matchmaker:** shut up landon! 

**Matchmaker:** shes also wonder y were all on our phones can we focus on that please!?

 **hot &feisty: **awe jojo ur so adorable! where r u I wanna come kiss u 4 being the most adorable thing in the universe

 **BiMess:** no u will stay as far away from us as possible! i already feel the need 2 throw up!

 **SlyFox:** guuuuyss! stop getting distracted!

 **DragonMaster:** rite sry

 **hot &feisty: **1st things 1st have u asked kaleb 2 hang out 2nite?

 **SlyFox:**...

 **Matchmaker:** well u should probably do that now then

_13:14_

**_private chat between GodOfSchemes and SlyFox_ **

**SlyFox:** hey kaleb if ur not busy 2nite u wanna hang out?

 **GodOfSchemes:** yea sure when and where?

 **SlyFox:** how abt 4:30 we could meet at the park and decide wat 2 do from there

 **GodOfSchemes:** dope cya there

_**group chat 'Shipping Crew'** _

**SlyFox:** ok its done

 **BiMess:** proof?

 **SlyFox:** bloody hell

 **SlyFox:** [youhappy.jpg]

 **hot &feisty: **ok then will meet at my house at 4 and will help u get ready

 **DragonMaster:** operation: get MG a hot boyfriend is about to start! Get ready folks

 **Matchmaker:** r u talking 2 us??

 **DragonMaster:** no im talking 2 the readers

 **SlyFox:**???

 **BiMess:** hes finally snapped... well I'll call the psych ward

 **DragonMaster:** fuck off

_15:47_

**_group chat 'Rule No.2. Answer Your Fucking Phone'_ **

**DivineArt:** um so... 1 of my friends rly wants me 2 add them 2 the gc...

 **GodOfSchemes:** it depends... r they hot??

 **AceHeart:** srsly smh

 **BiMess:** r they annoying? bc i dont want 2 b stuck w/ more annoying bitches

 **DragonHeart:** yea r they good company? do we kno them

 **DivineArt:** yes... and I think ull all b very happy actually

**_DivineArt has added Roman Empire to the chat_ **

**hot &feisty: **omg!

 **SlyFox:** this is

 **BiMess:** the best day. EVER!

 **Roman Empire:** sorry for intruding, Hope has been smiling at her phone for awhile now and she never smiles so... wanted to see what the fuss was about.

 **GodOfSchemes:** u hear that guys

 **hot &feisty: **hope smiles!!

 **DragonMaster:** awe I knew u loved us!

 **DivineArt:** jeez u don't have 2 sell me out like that!

 **TopDog:** srry im lost... who r u?

 **Roman Empire:** I'm Roman, I used to go to your school but I transferred

 **Matchmaker:** hope still talks 2 him bc he transferred 2 some private school her family runs

 **TopDog:** if ur family runs a private school y dont u go there hope??

 **DivineArt:** bc the kids there r fake and r shitty people in general

 **Roman Empire:** well I feel hurt

 **DivineArt:** not u of course

 **Roman Empire:** I know, you've made it perfectly clear I'm the only non-shitty person there

 **Roman Empire:** And I honestly agree with you. And if you weren't here to keep me sane, even if just on the weekends, I think I'd lose my mind

 **BiMess:** so roman... would u prefer a winter or summer wedding?

 **Matchmaker:** ignore her

 **hot &feisty: **hey i called dips!

 **BiMess:** fuck u satan i dont care abt ur "dips"

 **AceHeart:** u do remember ur both in relationships rite

 **Roman Empire:** This is going to be... interesting

 **DivineArt:** u have no idea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = SlyFox  
> Lizzie Saltzman = BiMess  
> Kaleb Hawkins = GodOfSchemes  
> Penelope Park = hot&feisty  
> Josie Salzman = Matchmaker  
> Hope Mikaelson = DivineArt  
> Landon Kirby = DragonMaster  
> Rafael Waithe = AceHeart  
> Jed = TopDog  
> Roman Sienna = Roman Empire


	22. we hack the hacker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **TopDog:** ITS THE WEEKEND HOW IS IT POSSIBLE 2 WALK IN ON YOUR TEACHER AND SCHOOL COUNCILER ON THE WEEKEND!?!?!?
> 
>  **DragonMaster:** THEY WERE FUCKING IN THE WOODS!!!!!
> 
>  **TopDog:** WHAT WERE U DOING IN THE WOODS!?!?!?!?
> 
>  **DragonMaster:** NOT TRYING TO SEE MY TEACHER AND COUNCILER GET IT ON THATS FOR SURE
> 
>  **TopDog:** WHY R WE STILL YELLING!?!?
> 
> OR
> 
> Kaleb is added back to the "Shipping Crew", Penelope found Rafael a strace buddy (whatever the hell that means) and both Landon and Lizzie have a bit of a bad day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have come to the realization that any two characters could get together and I would probably be fine with it

Saturday

_09:39_

_**Group chat 'Shipping Crew'** _

**DragonMaster:** mg get the fuck out here and tell us wat happened!

 **BiMess:** Yea we lost site of u

 **hot &feisty: **spill the fucking tea bitch!

 **Matchmaker:** What they mean to say is: did everything work out??

 **BiMess:** no u mean that

 **DragonMaster:** we mean: MG STOP IGNORING US

 **SlyFox:** jeez woud y'all shut up im tryin' 2 sleep

 **hot &feisty: **had a last nite did we ;)

 **SlyFox:** We didn't fuck if thats wat u think

 **hot &feisty:** damn it

 **Matchmaker:** Are you together now??

 **SlyFox:** no...

 **SlyFox:** not really...

 **DragonMaster** :not really?

 **SlyFox:** well i told him i like him

 **SlyFox:** and he told me he wasnt sure how he felt and wanted to figure some stuff out

 **SlyFox:** so we might get together 1 day but we're gonna just be friends for rite now

 **BiMess:** question: did we help at all!?

 **SlyFox:** no u kinda ruined the whole evening tbh

 **BiMess:** yeah thats wat i thought

 **Matchmaker:** do we add kaleb back now??

 **hot &feisty: **i suppose so...

 **_DragonMaster_ ** _**has added godOfSchemes to the chat** _

**GodOfSchemes:** so uve finally come 2 ur senses and realize that im also the god of love!

 **DragonMaster** :yeah sure lets go w/ that

_11:08_

**_group chat 'Rule No.2. Answer Your Fucking Phone'_ **

**hot &feisty: **yo ralf we found u a strace buddy

 **AceHeart:** a wat???

 **hot &feisty: **a strace

 **BiMess:** wtf u going on abt evil 1

 **DivineArt:** by "strace" she means "straight asexual"

 **Roman Empire:** Oh, I get it

 **hot &feisty: **thank u!

 **GodOfSchemes:** also u dont have 2 talk so proper dude

 **AceHeart:** ok so who is it??

 **hot &feisty: **its maya's brother ethan

 **hot &feisty: **also he's hot

 **BiMess:** maya...

 **BiMess:** oh! the girl that found hope crying in the bathroom!

 **DivineArt:** i wasnt crying!

 **BiMess:** ...whatever u say

 **hot &feisty: **anyway we ran in2 them and got 2 talking

 **AceHeart:** yeah ik him. he was the best qb ive ever seen but now he cant play

 **AceHeart:** didnt kno he was ace tho thats cool

 **hot &feisty: **also every1 whos bi needs 2 meet maya cuz she is a fucking bisexual icon

 **DivineArt:** not gonna lie, she kinda is

 **GodOfSchemes:** she sounds dope u should add her

 **BiMess:** u have her number rite babe?

 **DivineArt:** i feel like we should have a 1 person per week rule

 **Roman Empire:** yea am i not enough for u guys??

 **GodOfSchemes:** eyyy there we go!

 **BiMess:** will u never let me have a 3some!?

 **DivineArt:** girlfriend for sale anyone want her?

 **hot &feisty: **i knew this day would come!

 **hot &feisty: **just throw her out w/ the trash

 **Roman Empire:** those 2 do not get along do they

 **GodOfSchemes:** nope

 **AceHeart:** not 1 bit

_14:24_

**_private chat between DragonMaster and TopDog_ **

**DragonMaster:** i need 2 bleach my eyes

 **TopDog:** wat happened??

 **DragonMaster:** i just walked in on Mr. Williams and Emma!!! #_#

 **DragonMaster:** rip my soul

 **TopDog:** THAT IS SOME TERRIBLE LUCK!!!

 **DragonMaster:** IKR!!!!

 **TopDog:** ITS THE WEEKEND HOW IS IT POSSIBLE 2 WALK IN ON YOUR TEACHER AND SCHOOL COUNCILER ON THE WEEKEND!?!?!?

 **DragonMaster:** THEY WERE FUCKING IN THE WOODS!!!!!

 **TopDog:** WHAT WERE U DOING IN THE WOODS!?!?!?!?

 **DragonMaster:** NOT TRYING TO SEE MY TEACHER AND COUNCILER GET IT ON THATS FOR SURE

 **TopDog:** WHY R WE STILL YELLING!?!?

 **DragonMaster:**...good point

 **TopDog:** u ok baby??

 **DragonMaster:** no

 **DragonMaster:** idk if ill ever be ok again... not after seeing _that_

 **TopDog:** wanna come over? 

**DragonMaster:** please!

 **TopDog:** ill make sure theres lots 2 do so u wont even have 2 think abt 

**DragonMaster:** u r the best and ilysm

 **TopDog:** ily2 even if u do have horrible luck

_18:13_

**_private chat between BiMess and hot &feisty_ **

**BiMess:** we have a serious problem

 **hot &feisty: **did the creepy stalker come back

 **BiMess:** yes but worse

 **BiMess:** because this time he's targeting me

 **hot &feisty: **oh... well good luck bai!

 **BiMess:** hold it rite there satan! ur gonna help me whether u like it or not!

 **hot &feisty: **y should I??

 **BiMess:** bc i said so

 **BiMess:** and bc i live w/ josie so if he comes after me she could b in danger 2

 **hot &feisty: **...

 **hot &feisty:** fine! 1st of all how'd he get ur number??

 **BiMess:** idk he's a creepy hacker remember!?

 **hot &feisty: **show me wat he said

 **BiMess:** [thisguyisfuckingcreepy.jpg]

 **hot &feisty: **I kinda feel sry 4 u elizabeth

 **BiMess:** as u should

 **hot &feisty: **since this guy clearly cant take no 4 an answer maybe we should try something else

 **BiMess:** like wat??

 **hot &feisty: **isnt it obvious?

 **hot &feisty:** we hack the hacker

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Where do I begin?? Well, Legacies is back, and we had a great episode this week as always! We now know who the necromancer's accomplice was, but I'm still a bit confused. We've seen three red cloaked people but we only know who two of them are... Sebastian's story brought me to tears, and I hate Lizzie cry, though what exactly happened to him?? We got a lot of Hosie content this week, which I am here for! Why couldn't they both just date Landon? (along with each other, of course) Stupid monogamy! Speaking of Landon, he's sick of being a sidekick, which, awesome. Pretty sure we've all been waiting for him to man up and learn how to fight.
> 
> Looks like there's going to be some angst next week. Hope and the witchy-bitch are gonna face off and... Hope calls Landon useless... I love you Hope, but that's a little harsh. What exactly happened to make her say so? Given the title, and the "Your plan failed" I'm guessing something he came up with went horribly wrong. Hope looked pretty upset after all.
> 
> Also sidenote: I talked about the muggle siblings this chapter, and that's because I want to see them again! The last time we saw either of the was in episode six! That's kind of the reason I haven't added them yet. I want to, but I want to know more about them first. Even in the episodes they've been in, they're only in a few scenes. I want more of them, especially Maya.
> 
> Anyway, I'll shut up now, hope you enjoyed!


	23. i do like 2 rise with the sun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **DivineArt:** u r way 2 overprotective
> 
>  **SlyFox:** i second that
> 
>  **hot &feisty: **i guess the 1s closest 2 u r always the 1s that hurt u
> 
>  **BiMess:** u r so dramatic
> 
>  **GodOfSchemes:** so r u
> 
>  **AceHeart:** listen hoes ur all dramatic
> 
> OR
> 
> some of the gang have a late night chat, a few of the kids get pissed about different things and Penelope hatches a plan that confuses Josie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't updated all week! I'll tell you now that I'll upload at least once a week after the new episode airs but other than that I can't promise anything.

Monday

_03:43_

_**group chat 'Rule No.2. Answer Your Fucking Phone'** _

_**DragonMaster has changed the chat name to 'I CAN'T SLEEP'** _

**DragonMaster:** every1 wake up and entertain me!!!

 **Matchmaker:** i got up bc i was hungry and now i cant sleep so good timing i guess

 **Roman Empire:** my roommate is a pain in the ass and is up all nite partying so I am 2

 **GodOfSchemes:** my phone kept buzzing. so now im up

 **TopDog:** u kno there rly shouldnt b this many of us up at this hour...

 **Roman Empire:** yeah u've got a point

 **Matchmaker:** and we've got school tmw or 2da technically

 **DragonMaster:** can we just talk abt the fact that neither hope or penelope r up! the 2 nite owls

 **GodOfSchemes:** how have they not been woken up by u lot? theyre pretty light sleepers

 **TopDog:** they probably have their notifications off

 **DragonMaster:** he doesnt kno wat that is lmao

 **Matchmaker:** true true

 **GodOfSchemes:** fuck off

 **Roman Empire:** u guys r very lively

 **TopDog:** u'll get use 2 it

 **Roman Empire:** no its not a bad thing

 **Roman Empire:** when I 1st met hope she was going through a lot and barely ever smiled

 **Roman Empire:** it only got worse after her parents died but since meeting u guys shes been... happier

 **GodOfSchemes:** knew she liked us

 **Matchmaker:** glad we could help

 **DragonMaster:** we love our girl even tho shes completely oblivious

 **TopDog:** sry if im crossing a boundary but y did u 2 break up??

 **Roman Empire:** its fine. its complicated but basically our families they don't get along and my mother made me do some things...

 **DragonMaster:** hope told me she forgave u by the way!

 **DragonMaster:** pissed me off at the time but i like u now

 **Roman Empire:** uh thanks...?

 **GodOfSchemes:** jfc lan make up ur mind

 **TopDog:** i dont rly get any of this but whatever

_**DragonMaster has changed TopDog's name to 'ConfusedAf'** _

**ConfusedAf:** pretty much yea

 **Matchmaker:** u boys can continue on w/o me im going back bed

 **DragonMaster:** gn

 **ConfusedAf:** nite

 **Roman Empire:** night

 **GodOfSchemes:** lucky u

 **ConfusedAf:** again if u wanna go 2 bed that badly just turn off ur notifications

 **BiMess:** SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!

 **Roman Empire:**...

 **GodOfSchemes:**...

 **DragonMaster:** so this is y she left... sneaky little fox

 **ConfusedAf:** makes sense

 **BiMess:** go. to. sleep! or else!

 **DragonMaster:** ok ok we're going!

 **Roman Empire:** nite everybody

_05:54_

**AceHeart:** u guys never learn

 **hot &feisty: **elizabeth flipped out!

 **BiMess:** they deserved it

 **SlyFox:** apart from landon i wouldnt expect theyd b the 1s up

 **DivineArt:** i was up but i simply chose not 2 reply

 **GodOfSchemes:** fuck y didnt i think of that!?

 **hot &feisty: **damn wish i was up

 **AceHeart:** r landon jed and roman still sleeping???

 **DivineArt:** probably. probably gonna b late 2

 **Matchmaker:** how did u kno i wasnt still asleep?

 **AceHeart:** cuz u live w/ lizzie

 **Matchmaker:** fair

 **BiMess:** i do like 2 rise with the sun

 **GodOfSchemes:** I'd just like to say that any1 who was up last nite better hope i dont run in2 them

 **Matchmaker:** ok im a little scared...

 **hot &feisty: **touch her and u die hawkins

 **DivineArt:** u r way 2 overprotective

 **SlyFox:** i second that

 **hot &feisty: **i guess the 1s closest 2 u r always the 1s that hurt u

 **BiMess:** u r so dramatic

 **GodOfSchemes:** so r u

 **AceHeart:** listen hoes ur all dramatic

 **DivineArt:** thats fair

_10:29_

**_private chat between hot &feisty and Matchmaker_ **

**Matchmaker:** stop looking at me with those sad puppy-dog eyes im trying 2 concentrate

 **hot &feisty: **u dont even know what I want

 **Matchmaker:** ur sitting next 2 sebastian which means ur scheming so no

 **hot &feisty: **but jojo!

 **hot &feisty: **its not even that big of a deal cmon pleaseeee

 **Matchmaker:** stop it

_10:32_

**Matchmaker:** penelope istg stop looking at me like that!

 **hot &feisty:** then just hear me out

 **Matchmaker:**...

 **Matchmaker:** 1 minute then im muting my phone and moving seat 2 somewhere i cant c u

 **hot &feisty: **u r the absolute best my love

 **hot &feisty: **ok so it has 2 do with my least favourite couple

 **Matchmaker:** if u want me 2 break up my sister and hope bc ur friend is still obsessed with her then my answer is no

 **hot &feisty: **relax as much as i dislike lizzie hope's my best friend i wouldnt ruin her happiness like that

 **hot &feisty: **listen lizzie was just as obssessed with sebastian as he was her. if not more

 **hot &feisty: **sebastian wants her back and i want 2 prevent them from getting back together

 **Matchmaker:** y exactly didnt u just say that? i would never be opposed 2 this

 **hot &feisty: **well...

 **Matchmaker:** whats the catch?

 **hot &feisty: **well we both kno lizzie wont talk 2 me

 **hot &feisty: **and when sebastian makes his move she'll obviously talk 2 u abt it so...

 **hot &feisty: **maybe press the issue c if she still likes him...

 **Matchmaker:** nd wat exactly do u get out of this?

 **hot &feisty: **i have my reasons

 **Matchmaker:** penelope park u'll b the death of me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few things. 1) this isn't me saying I don't like sizzy, I'm actually hoping they sit down, talk about their feelings and get together for real but this isn't a sizzy fic so yeah. 2) this also isn't me making him into a bad guy, he'll be added later on because I absolutely adore Sebastian/Thomas Doherty, he won't be with Lizzie in this fic but he might have another love interest. I just haven't seen him interact that much with other characters, all the characters I can think of already have a love interest here. Maybe a throuple??? And finally 3) although they have never met in cannon, I love the idea of Penelope and Sebastian being partners in crime. I can see them teaming up to get the Salzman twins, helping each other out sort of thing... someone needs to write that.
> 
> Anyway I don't think I have time for a long ass rant this week but I'll just say it was a great episode, can't wait for next week and, YAY WE GET TO SEE KAI SOON!!!!! If anyone wants to discuss it in the comments I'll be sure to answer ;)


	24. title of ur sex tape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Matchmaker:** roman im just making sure ur laptop is set up bc im pretty sure hope would kill u if u missed this
> 
>  **Roman Empire:** yep everything is set up just waiting for it 2 start
> 
>  **hot &feisty:** 2 episodes! amazing! i cant wait! this is everything i want out of life!
> 
>  **ConfusedAf:** we finished season 6 and now everyones running around hopes house like maniacs until the premiere starts
> 
>  **DivineArt:** this is y i don't like people coming over
> 
> OR
> 
> everyone's excited for the Brooklyn nine-nine premiere, Hope is on the warpath and Roman feels a little left out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you couldn't tell already, this chapter is very Brooklyn nine-nine centric :)

Thursday

_16:03_

**_group chat 'I CAN'T SLEEP'_ **

**DragonMaster:** its been like 4 days and Ive missed u guys

 **AceHeart:** we c each other every day at school man

 **BiMess:** and as ive said b4... we have a life

 **Matchmaker:** dont listen 2 her hope and penelope have been rewatching b99 w/ us all week to prepare 4 the season 7 premire 2nite

 **hot &feisty: **haha called out

 **ConfusedAf:** u were 2

 **hot &feisty:** im not ashamed

 **SlyFox:** oh me god i forgot it was on 2nite!!!

 **DragonMaster:** how dare u

 **DivineArt:** mg u r disowned and i never want 2 see ur face again

 **GodOfSchemes:** damn hope!

 **AceHeart:** that was agressive

 **Roman Empire:** jfc

 **DragonMaster:** u dont mess w/ hope when it comes 2 b99

 **hot &feisty: **sry mg no1 can save u now

 **SlyFox:** IM SORRY PLS DONT ABANDON ME

 **Matchmaker:** she says "fucking asshole bitch thinking an apology is all it takes"

 **ConfusedAf:** ok im a bit scared

 **Roman Empire:** same here

 **GodOfSchemes:** sry mg u had a good run

 **SlyFox:** im sry! i made a mistake ok!

 **DragonMaster:** title of ur sex tape

 **BiMess:** hobbit i have never like u... until rite now

 **hot &feisty: **[I'llmissyoumyqueen.mp4]

 **AceHeart:** yo r y'all crying in the background

 **Matchmaker:** ITS SAD OK

 **hot &feisty: **GINA LEAVING IS 1 OF THE SADDEST MOMENTS OF THE ENTIRE SERIES U BITCH

 **DivineArt:** Rafael you are also disowned for questioning how sad Gina's farewell is

 **ConfusedAf:** hope is on a warpath tdy

 **DragonMaster:** from the huge tv im guessing ur at hopes house... im coming over

 **GodOfSchemes:** me 2

 **ConfusedAf:** and me

 **Roman Empire:** damn wish i didn't go 2 a boarding school rn

 **DivineArt:** wow wow wow! don't jst invite urselves over!

 **BiMess:** babe u kno there just going 2 come over anyway

 **Matchmaker:** might as well welcome them

 **DivineArt:**...

 **DivineArt:** ok fine! mg, rafael... u can come 2

 **DivineArt:** but b careful! ur walking on thin fucking ice

 **SlyFox:** ur the best!

 **AceHeart:** yes ma'am

 **Roman Empire:** now I feel rly left out w aren't allowed tv on week days

 **ConfusedAf:** jst stream it on ur laptop

 **Roman Empire:** that's a good idea

 **hot &feisty: **and if not... u could always jst sneak out

 **GodOfSchemes:** gurl u r horrible

 **hot &feisty: **o ik ;)

_18:22_

**GodOfSchemes:** so 2 recap we've figured out that hope is rosa lizzie and penelope are both gina and im obviously doug judy 

**DivineArt:** obviously

 **GodOfSchemes:** we still dont kno who every1 else is

 **AceHeart:** the characters r all just so unique

 **BiMess:** i still don't think i should b lumped in w/ the she-devil

 **Roman Empire:** u 2 r actually pretty similar

 **DragonMaster:** that's wat i said!

 **hot &feisty: **and we all agreed that jake is bi

 **Roman Empire:** i mean... yea

 **SlyFox:** wish it was cannon

 **Matchmaker:** who says it isnt??

 **GodOfSchemes:** tru dat

 **Roman Empire:** so wat episode r u guys on

 **DivineArt:** ticking clocks

 **BiMess:** amy's fomow is everything i live for

 **AceHeart:** also now I want garlic bread

 **DragonMaster:** _and_ lasagne 

_19:53_

**Matchmaker:** roman im just making sure ur laptop is set up bc im pretty sure hope would kill u if u missed this

 **Roman Empire:** yep everything is set up just waiting for it 2 start

 **hot &feisty:** 2 episodes! amazing! i cant wait! this is everything i want out of life!

 **ConfusedAf:** we finished season 6 and now everyones running around hopes house like maniacs until the premiere starts

 **DivineArt:** this is y i don't like people coming over

_20:49_

**DragonMaster:** ahhhhhhhhhhhhh

 **BiMess:** i could die happy

 **SlyFox** : my only regret is that rosa was barely in episode 2

 **DivineArt:** that was disappointing but other than that everything is right in the world

 **GodOfSchemes:** never seen her laugh as much as she did 2nite

 **Roman Empire:** im feeling rly left out

 **Matchmaker:** u watched it didn't u??

 **Roman Empire:** yea but would have been better watching it w/ u guys

 **hot &feisty: **that was rly sweet

 **ConfusedAf:** next week we'll definitely sneak u out

 **AceHeart:** boarding school must suck

 **Roman Empire:** kinda yea

 **BiMess:** hope I demand u bring us w/ u 2 see roman this weekend

 **DivineArt:** demand huh?

 **SlyFox:** pleaseeeeeee

 **DivineArt:** ok fine but don't cause any trouble! the school is very strict

 **hot &feisty: **yess!

 **GodOfSchemes** : this is going 2 be fun

 **Matchmaker:** cant wait

 **Roman Empire:** u guys r awesome

 **DragonMaster:** o! and we can graffiti the entire school!

 **AceHeart:** I'll bring the spray cans

 **DivineArt:** I'm regretting this already

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> since I missed last weeks update, prepare for two recaps... *clears throat*
> 
> Episode 11:
> 
> There was a bit of Handon angst at the start, Landon tries to tap into his phoenix powers and gathers a... alternate super squad? The writers keep ripping out my heart because poor MG just can't be happy. First Lizzie doesn't love him back, then the other girl I forgot the name of left and now Kym (no joke, I literally cried when she left). Cupid almost shot Kaleb and for a second I legit thought him and MG would finally be cannon, unfortunately Landon and Hope stopped him. Jed is in love with... Emma?? And finaly, Handon is everything I've ever wanted. steamy bath kisses? Check. Adorable insecurities? Check. Cutesly poem type things?? Check. Also, Landon can fly!!! So episode 11 was awesome!
> 
> Episode 12:
> 
> Damn they just keep getting better and better. Kai returns, which is amazing! We get another bisexual icon, Jade, she is amazing, I love her already, I want more of her. Josie is the leading lady this episode which is absolutely amazing (like I was only the tiniest bit sad we didn't get any Hope this week). Alaric kinda made me really mad this episode because, damn! Also, I'm not sure where I stand on Sebastian anymore... He manipulated Lizzie, and is clearly not over his ex. Now onto the most important part. So Josie broke the glass... and Kai is the new Malivore monster... really didn't expect him to jump into the pit but it is Kai so you never really know what to expect.
> 
> There is so much more to cover but I have other things to do today so Imma just leave it there. Next weeks episode looks even more intense, I can't wait! See you then!


	25. and there she goes again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **hot &feisty: **like u didnt ask me 2 pour wax on u the other nite when i refused 2 _actually_ burn u
> 
>  **GodOfSchemes:** and i oop-
> 
>  **SlyFox:** TMI! FUCKING T! M! I!
> 
>  **DivineArt:** well thats kinky
> 
>  **BiMess:** PENELOPE PARK KEEP UR HANDS OFF MY SISTER!!!!
> 
>  **DragonMaster:** so I'm still trying 2 wrap my head around... all that but josie's just kinda standing in the middle of town square...
> 
> OR
> 
> Landon freaks out, Lizzie helps out Josie and everyone plans for the road trip

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapter in less then a week? Who is she!?

Friday

_15:14_

_**group chat 'I CAN'T SLEEP'** _

**DragonMaster:** help! send help!!

 **hot &feisty: **wats up dragon boy

 **DragonMaster:** josies trying 2 kill meh!!!

 **Matchmaker:** I am not!

 **GodOfSchemes:** wats happening exactly??

 **DivineArt:** who knows I've given up on trying 2 understand them

 **DragonMaster:** shes got a weapon!! hilp!

 **SlyFox:** hilp

 **BiMess:** hilp

 **hot &feisty: **hilp

 **GodOfSchemes:** hilp

 **hot &feisty: **k lanny we'll send some hilp

 **SlyFox:** I'll come hilp u rite now

 **BiMess:** don't worry hobbit I'm a very hilpful person

 **DivineArt:** children. all of u

 **DragonMaster:** 1st of all I hate u all 2ndly CAN WE GET BACK TO JOSIE TRYING TO MURDER MEE

 **Matchmaker:** landon! I swear I'm not trying 2 kill u

 **GodOfSchemes:** k how bout u tell us the situation then we'll come hilp u

 **DragonMaster:** _hate_

 **DragonMaster:** but fine I'll set the scene

 **DragonMaster:** so josie and I have a history project rite?

 **DragonMaster:** so we went 2 the town square and we're working for about 20 mins and my pen runs out of ink

 **DragonMaster:** I didn't have a spare so i asked josie so she looks through her pencil case and the net second she pulls out a lighter

 **DragonMaster:** A FUCKING LIGHTER U GUYS!!!!!!!

 **DragonMaster:** then she stares at it for like 10 seconds before lighting it!!! SHE'S OBVIOUSLY A SERIAL KILLER

 **BiMess:** thats wat all the fuss is abt??

 **hot &feisty: **boo was hoping 4 a more interesting story

 **DivineArt:** seriously y r u getting so freaked out landon?

 **SlyFox:** damn dude gettin' me all worked up 4 nothin'

 **Matchmaker:** see I'm not trying 2 kill u!

 **DragonMaster:** w

 **DragonMaster:** h

 **DragonMaster:** a

 **DragonMaster:** t

 **DragonMaster:** da fuck u guys!?

 **GodOfSchemes:** yo I'm just a confused as u

 **SlyFox** :dont worry jo's just a bit of a pyromaniac

 **BiMess:** she doesn't like compulsively burn down buildings or anything but shes obsessed w/ fire thats all

 **Matchmaker:** for the last time im not a pyromaniac!

 **hot &feisty: **like u didnt ask me 2 pour wax on u the other nite when i refused 2 _actually_ burn u

 **GodOfSchemes:** and i oop-

 **SlyFox:** TMI! FUCKING T! M! I!

 **DivineArt:** well thats kinky

 **BiMess:** PENELOPE PARK KEEP UR HANDS OFF MY SISTER!!!!

 **DragonMaster:** so I'm still trying 2 wrap my head around... all that but josie's just kinda standing in the middle of town square...

 **hot &feisty: **all im saying is...

**_hot &feisty has changed Matchmaker's name to 'JustALittlePyro'_ **

**hot &feisty: **yep that abt sums it up

 **JustALittlePyro:** god i hate u

 **DragonMaster:** o shes back

 **hot &feisty: **love u 2 babe

 **DragonMaster:** and there she goes again

_15:36_

**_private chat between BiMess and JustALittlePyro_ **

**JustALittlePyro:** y does she keep saying that so casually? thats like the 3rd time and it's always so... sudden? idk the word

 **BiMess:** u should kno by now that penelope park is not a very emotional person

 **BiMess:** but I mean she probably means it?? I'm trying not 2 be biased here but she would stupid not 2 love u

 **JustALittlePyro:** ur not going 2 so say something mean about how penelope doesn't know how 2 love??

 **BiMess:** I was going 2 but mg slapped the phone out of my hand and told me 2 write something nicer

 **JustALittlePyro:** yea that makes sense

 **JustALittlePyro:** but srsly wat do I do!? do I call her out? ask her if she means it?

 **BiMess:** uh... say u love her 2?? 

**BiMess:** again mg is reading over my shoulder

 **JustALittlePyro:** wat if I...

 **JustALittlePyro:** nvm

 **BiMess:** no pausing! tell me!

 **JustALittlePyro:** idk...

 **BiMess:** twin code jo! c'mon

 **JustALittlePyro:** ok fine!

 **JustALittlePyro:** I'm not even sure I love her

 **BiMess:** oh...

 **BiMess:** wat do u mean??

 **JustALittlePyro:** im not saying I don't love her im just not sure wat being in love feels like u kno??

 **JustALittlePyro:** ive never been in love b4 that's all

 **BiMess:** yeah ok I get it

 **JustALittlePyro:** how did you know you were in love w/ hope?

 **BiMess:** uh... I guess... i can be myself around her and she doesnt judge me

 **BiMess:** u kno how in the movies they always say they can't live without there partner?

 **JustALittlePyro:** yeah...

 **BiMess:** well I know I could live w/o her but I don't _want_ 2

 **BiMess:** does that help?

 **JustALittlePyro:** I think so yeah

 **JustALittlePyro:** thx lizzie

 **BiMess:** don't mention it

 **JustALittlePyro:** im gonna go talk to her

 **BiMess:** go get her!

 **JustALittlePyro:** mg again?

 **BiMess:** big time

_16:42_

**_group chat 'I CAN'T SLEEP'_ **

**AceHeart:** wat is this? confession city?

 **GodOfSchemes:** huh

**_GodOfSchemes has changed the chat name to 'Confession City'_ **

**SlyFox:** there has been quite a few confessions

 **DivineArt:** pretty sure that was like... the second time it happened

 **TopDog:** damn I hate missing things!

 **Roman Empire:** I hate that my school doesn't get out till 3:30

 **DragonMaster:** speaking of ur school...

 **Slyfox:** ROAD TRIP!!!

 **AceHeart:** spray cans r packed and ready

 **TopDog:** question

 **GodOfSchemes:** answer 

**hot &feisty: **answer

 **DragonMaster:** answer

 **BiMess:** answer

 **SlyFox:** answer

 **Roman Empire:** answer

 **JustALittlePyro:** wow

 **DivineArt:** once again ur all children

 **TopDog:** ANYWAY

 **TopDog:** how long exactly will it take 2 drive up there?

 **DivineArt:** just a couple of hours

 **TopDog:** cool

 **AceHeart:** so whos driving?

 **SlyFox:** uhh...

 **hot &feisty: **well

 **GodOfSchemes:** not it

 **BiMess:** ur all useless

 **DivineArt:** so ur gonna drive then?

 **BiMess:**...

 **Roman Empire:** so none of u want 2 drive??

 **AceHeart:** welp this weekend is already turning out 2 b a disaster

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = SlyFox  
> Lizzie Saltzman = BiMess  
> Kaleb Hawkins = GodOfSchemes  
> Penelope Park = hot&feisty  
> Josie Salzman = JustALittlePyro  
> Hope Mikaelson = DivineArt  
> Landon Kirby = DragonMaster  
> Rafael Waithe = AceHeart  
> Jed = TopDog  
> Roman Sienna = Roman Empire


	26. try not 2 kill each other

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **DragonMaster:** but shes tiny and can barely see lmfao
> 
>  **GodOfSchemes:** its honestly adorable
> 
>  **GodOfSchemes:** o fuck! I take it back
> 
>  **hot &feisty: **yo hope stop attacking them and open up!
> 
>  **hot &feisty:** u know... if u can reach the controls
> 
>  **DivineArt:** the trip is cancelled u can all go die in a ditch
> 
> OR
> 
> The weekend road trip begins, Penelope and Lizzie fight (as per usual) and Hope's in a bit of a bad mood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A MONTH!! WE HAVE TO WAIT A MOTHER FUCKING MONTH FOR THE NEXT EPISODE FFBNIFNBALRNGVAJRWNGV!!!!!!!!

Saturday

_07:44_

**_group chat 'Confession City'_ **

**GodOfSchemes:** I should not b up this early on a Saturday!

 **BiMess:** well I should not b forced 2 watch my sister suck face w/ the devil but we don't always get wat we want

 **hot &feisty: **yea... turns out i couldnt pick up josie w/o the blonde coming 2

 **DragonMaster:** jeez u guys stop complaining

 **DivineArt:** and every1 better b on their way bc we have 2 leave by 8

 **JustALittlePyro:** sry guys but the rest of us cant run on 4 hours sleep

 **GodOfSchemes:** o yea btw mg jed and rafael r coming l8er cuz they couldnt be bothered gettin' out of bed this early

 **DivineArt:** fine whatever just hurry up and get here

 **Roman Empire:** jeez hope calm down its fine take ur time

_**BiMess has changed their name to 'worstintheworld'** _

**worstintheworld:** gndfinginersh

 **DragonMaster:**???

 **JustALittlePyro:** this is wat happens when u put lizzie and penelope in a car together

 **Roman Empire:** im so confused... ur takng a car to get 2 another car??

 **DragonMaster:** so wat happened was we realized 1 car wasnt big enough 2 fit all of us

 **DragonMaster:** so we were gonna drive up seperatley but then we remebered the only ones that have cars r penelope hope and mg

 **DragonMaster:** since mgs coming up l8ter he'll be taking ralf and jed i guess and hopes car is in the shop

 **DivineArt:** yeah because _someone_ ran my car in2 the sidewalk

 **hot &feisty: **i said i was sorry!

 **DragonMaster:** so once again we're back 2 only 1 available car

 **DragonMaster:** but then we remembered that "hey hope is super fucking rich"

 **Roman Empire:** so... how r u getting here

 **JustALittlePyro** :hope has a party bus at her disposal

 **DivineArt:** its not mine its my uncle Kol's

**_worstintheworld has changed their name to 'CoffeeWouldBeNice'_ **

**CoffeeWouldBeNice:** seriously I can not b asked 2 operate on no coffee at this hour of the morning

 **GodOfSchemes:** were not stopping for coffee in a huge ass bus

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** josie my dear sister

 **JustALittlePyro:** no! we're almost there

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** damn it....

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** hope my love

 **DivineArt:** no! my house is nowhere near any coffee shop

 **hot &feisty: **haha

 **GodOfSchemes:** yo im here let me on da bus

 **DragonMaster:** hang on we're trying 2 figure out how 2 use this thing

 **Roman Empire:** so whos driving?

 **DivineArt:** well im the only 1 who knows how

 **JustALittlePyro:** r u sure bc I don't wanna like... crash

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** don't b over dramatic jo

 **hot &feisty: **yeah and if we do crash ill make sure it only kills lizzie

 **GodOfSchemes:** aren't u 3 in a car together?? and who the fuck is driving!?

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** well these 2 decided they wanted 2 make out so I was driving but then satan took my phone and I wanted it back so now Penelope is driving

 **DragonMaster:** well considering shes texting and driving u might crash b4 u get here

 **hot &feisty: **relax my phone is connected 2 my speaker and it reads out all my notifacations and im using voice 2 text

 **JustALittlePyro:** and now we're not allowed 2 talk so not 2 mess w/ her messages hence the texting

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** is quite annoying actually

 **DivineArt:** going back on topic yes I am sure I can drive this thing but...

 **Roman Empire:** but...

 **DragonMaster:** but shes tiny and can barely see lmfao

 **GodOfSchemes:** its honestly adorable

 **GodOfSchemes:** o fuck! I take it back

 **hot &feisty: **yo hope stop attacking them and open up!

 **hot &feisty:** u know... if u can reach the controls

 **DivineArt:** the trip is cancelled u can all go die in a ditch

 **Roman Empire:** have fun guys and

 **Roman Empire:** try not 2 kill each other

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** no promises

_08:55_

**TopDog:** yo bitches we're on our way up

 **DivineArt** : well you'd b half way there already if u had bothered 2 get out of bed on time

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** don't listen 2 her shes a little grumpy this morning

 **AcHeart:** ys that??

 **GodOfSchemes:** bc she was 2 short so josie had 2 swap places w/ her and drive

 **DivineArt:** shut the fuck!

 **hot &feisty: **awe I think its cute that ur so short

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** shut up evil 1 ur not much taller then she is

 **hot &feisty: **ur only saying that bc ur whipper 4 hope

 **AceHeart:** u guys r on the same bus?? y r u texting

 **GodOfSchemes:** well landons asleep and josie keeps yelling at them 2 keep quiet

 **GodOfSchemes:** also goin' off topic here

 **GodOfSchemes:** THIS BUS HAS EVERYTHING!!! IT HAD A MINI-BAR AND FOOD THAT I DIDNT EVEN KNO EXISTS

 **GodOfSchemes:** also... a pole so...

 **DivineArt:** yea uncle kol used 2 b a bit of a...

 **hot &feisty: **slut

 **TopDog:** way 2 sugar coat it P

 **hot &feisty: **I wasn't trying 2

 **hot &feisty: **but srsly hope is set 4 life she doesn't need 2 work a day

 **DivineArt:** well maybe I want 2 work. maybe I don't want 2 rely on my family 4 the rest of my life

 **AceHeart:** thats fine we just sometimes forget that u come from such a prestigious family

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** urg gross! Penelope stop distracting my sister while shes driving!

 **GodOfSchemes:** lmao!

 **GodOfSchemes:** [catfight.mp4]

 **hot &feisty: **o shidd is that the school!?

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** looks more like a castle

 **DivineArt:** please don't do anything stupid u guys

 **TopDog:** is it rly that fancy??

 **GodOfSchemes:** yes

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** yes

 **hot &feisty: **fucking yes

 **AceHeart:** sweet cant wait 2 get there

 **GodOfSchemes:** this weekend is gonna b awesome!

 **DivineArt:** this weekend is going 2 b a disaster

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahem, let me start by saying that I am officially in love with dark Josie (well I'm in love with all versions of Josie but that's beside the point). The fact that she was so calm and emotionless was just... uhh! Amazing! And when Hope apologized for the breaking of the sandglass, the look on her face was just like "what for?" I officially stan Jade and 100% support her and Josie getting together because, let's face it, Penelope's most likely not coming back anytime soon and Hosie's probably not gonna happen (Don't get me wrong, I totally still ship them both with Josie but it most likely not gonna happen) and they have chemistry! Now... SEBASTIAN AND KAI A BOTH "DEAD" AND I AM NOT OKAY!!!! I mean... this is mystic falls so nothings guaranteed and this isn't exactly the first time Kai's been beheaded and we didn't actually see Sebastian die but... you know it's still sad... Landon has wings of flames!!! so that's cool. lot's of Handon this episode, tad of Hosie, bit of my new ship "Jasie", Sizzie but... no Hizzie…  
> Uhh what else... We saw a touch of humanity from Alyssa, so maybe she's not so bad after all. (Also, when I was rewatching season 1 for the millionth time I realized that Alyssa was mentioned in the very first episode and episode twelve, so that's cool. I'm really pissed that we have to wait a month for the new episode and that, as far as I can tell, is not going to play an important role (it might but doesn't look like it) I mean, why the hell are they doing a simulation?? But I'll survive... maybe.
> 
> (Also just a sidenote, last week I forgot to mention that we now know where Josie's fire obsession comes from, she saw Wendy doing it when she was little and must have thoughts it was really cool, at least that's what I took from it.)


	27. are u high or something??

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **DragonMaster:** Hope Andrea Mikaelson, you'd better start explaining yourself right this minute!!
> 
>  **GodOfSchemes:** he just middle named u dude
> 
>  **DivineArt:** lizzie come out of hiding there is no way im explaining this on my own
> 
>  **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** urg I have better things 2 do with my time
> 
>  **DivineArt:** well my whole family is in town so i can explain 2 them why their boarding school is covered in graffiti
> 
>  **AceHeart:** right... sorry about that
> 
> OR
> 
> Penelope makes a discovery that pisses her off, Hope and Lizzie have some explaining to do and everyone is very confused

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been planning this chapter for ages!

Monday

_17:17_

**_private chat between hot &feisty and JustALittlePyro_ **

**hot &feisty: **u kno how I said I wanted 2 stop hope and lizzie from breaking up?

 **JustALittlePyro:** do I remember u _actually_ trying 2 help my sister for the 1st time ever?? pretty sure yeah

 **hot &feisty: **well i changed my mind

 **JustALittlePyro:** what y?

 **hot &feisty: **because that bitch doesn't deserve hope

 **JustALittlePyro:** god Penelope! just when I think ur making progress!

 **hot &feisty: **jojo listen 2 me ok?

 **JustALittlePyro:** im listening

 **hot &feisty: **I just saw lizzie kissing some1 who isn't hope

 **JustALittlePyro:** what... no lizzie loves hope

 **JustALittlePyro:** maybe it wasn't her u saw! where did u see it? when?

 **hot &feisty: **ok calm down

 **hot &feisty: **I saw them literally just b4 I texted u

 **hot &feisty: **it was behind the grill and... Im 100% sure it was lizzie

 **JustALittlePyro:** I don't believe u

 **hot &feisty: **I thought u might say that so...

 **hot &feisty: **[see.jpg]

 **JustALittlePyro:** is that... maya??

 **hot &feisty: **yeah

 **JustALittlePyro:** im… im confused. why would she do this? she wouldn't do that 2 hope

 **hot &feisty: **well... lets find out what she was thinking

 **hot &feisty: **in fact! lets find out what everyone thinks about perfect lizzie after they see this

 **JustALittlePyro:** Penelope!

 **JustALittlePyro:** Penelope don't!

_17:29_

_**group chat 'Confession City'** _

**hot &feisty: **what do u have 2 say for urself Elizabeth!?

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** uhm... idk im bisexual?? sorry satan ur gonna have 2 b more specific

 **JustALittlePyro:** Penelope don't do this

 **SlyFox:** yo wats going on

 **GodOfSchemes:** more girl drama it looks like

 **DivineArt:** would u guys cool it for 5 minutes?

 **hot &feisty: **hope im coming over

 **DivineArt:** uhh I'm kind of in the middle of something rn

 **hot &feisty: **trust me ur gonna need a shoulder 2 cry on after this but its 4 ur own good

 **JustALittlePyro:** Penelope don't say anything you'll regret

 **ConfusedAf:** my username is very fitting right now cuz I have no clue whats going on

 **DragonMaster:** I thought it was 2 quiet around here

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** ok I'll play. oh great evil one, what is my sin?

 **hot &feisty: **honestly. just when im starting 2 think ur not the absolute worse u go and pull this shit

 **AceHeart:** damn she actually seems really mad

 **GodOfSchemes:** yo liz what exactly did u do

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** for once I have no idea

 **hot &feisty: **dig deep and think... what have you done wrong in this last hour

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** seriously!? Fine I... yah I got nothing because I HAVENT DONE ANYTHING

 **Roman Empire:** okay how about u just tell us what u think lizzie did wrong

 **JustALittlePyro:** Penelope please don't!

 **hot &feisty: **lizzie here is cheating on hope

 **DragonMaster:** WAIT WHAT

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** what r u _talking_ about!?!?

 **hot &feisty: **im talk about maya machado!!

 **ConfusedAf:** ethan's sister!?

 **AceHeart:** that doesn't make any sense

 **SlyFox:** why would lizzie cheat on hope!? they're like... crazy af about each other!!

 **hot &feisty: **[see.jpg]

 **GodOfSchemes:** well damn...

 **JustALittlePyro:** fucking... ok um... maybe lizzie could u like... explain this

 **Roman Empire:** hope isnt answering my texts

 **hot &feisty: **yeah shes probably hearkbroken

 **justALittlePyro:** neither is lizzie

 **SlyFox:** yo does any1 have maya's number

 **DragonMaster:** well... hope does but... u kno

 **ConfusedAf:** what should we do?

 **hot &feisty: **well i would like a full explanation

 **AceHeart** : i agree. lizzie why would u do this

 **Roman Empire:** i kno u play flirt a lot but i never thought u'd actually hurt hope

 **SlyFox:** im like... actually really disappointed in u liz

 **DivineArt:** ok everybody calm the FUCK down! lizzie isnt cheating on me!

 **JustALittlePyro:** i love my sister but... there's proof hope

 **DivineArt:** i told them 2 get better a sneaking around

 **hot &feisty: **what!?!?

 **ConfusedAf:** again really convenient username

 **DragonMaster:** Hope Andrea Mikaelson, you'd better start explaining yourself right this minute!!

 **GodOfSchemes:** he just middle named u dude

 **DivineArt:** lizzie come out of hiding there is no way im explaining this on my own

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** urg I have better things 2 do with my time

 **DivineArt:** well my whole family is in town so i can explain 2 them why their boarding school is covered in graffiti

 **AceHeart:** right... sorry about that

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** fine i tricked 2 hot girls into dating me ok bi

 **SlyFox:** what in the name of god

 **JustALittlePyro:** why do I not know about this? WHAT HAPPENED TO THE TWIN CODE!!?!?!?

_**hot &feisty has changed DivineArt's username to 'ChamberOfSecrets'** _

**ChamberOfSecrets:** seriously!?

 **hot &feisty**: GIVE ME MORE DETAILS!!!

 **ConfusedAf:** i still have no clue wats going on

 **Roman Empire:** none of us do

 **DragonMaster:** just wait to see what happends next

 **ChamberOfSecrets:** ok fine if i tell u a few things will u leave me alone!?

 **GodOfSchemes:** we'll consider it

 **ChamberOfSecrets:** istg... ok

 **ChamberOfSecrets:** little help saltzman

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** omg fine!

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** it happened on like... tuesday. basically hope thought she was like emotionally cheating on me with maya and it just kinda went from there

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** so if u think about it... hope was in the wrong so stop accusing mean of breaking her heart satan!! she broke mine jeez get it rite

 **DragonMaster:** are u high or something??

 **JustALittlePyro:** so r u guys in an open relationship now or...

 **ChamberOfSecrets:** no if u saw her kissing anyone else then yeah she'd be cheating

 **AceHeart:** so u have a thrid girlfriend now

 **ChamberOfSecrets:** uh...

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** we havent exactly figured it out yet its still new

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** now park... I want an apology :P

 **hot &feisty: **uh no way

 **JustALittlePyro:** penelope

 **hot &feisty: **_fine_. im sorry that u didnt tell us ur allowed 2 make out with maya which lead me 2 think u were cheating on my best friend

 **Roman Empire:** yeah thats probably the best we're gonna get

 **CoffeeWouldBeNice:** I'll think about forgiving u

 **ChamberOfSecrets:** glad 2 kno u care tho

 **hot &feisty: **oh fuck off mikaelson

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Characters + Their Usernames
> 
> Milton “MG” Greasley = SlyFox  
> Lizzie Saltzman = CoffeeWouldBeNice  
> Kaleb Hawkins = GodOfSchemes  
> Penelope Park = hot&feisty  
> Josie Salzman = JustALittlePyro  
> Hope Mikaelson = ChamberOfSecrets  
> Landon Kirby = DragonMaster  
> Rafael Waithe = AceHeart  
> Jed = ConfusedAf  
> Roman Sienna = Roman Empire


End file.
